midweek updates

ok finished playing pvz2 far future lol just started yesterday and completed it already. this spells something. no life.

super no mood to update this space today life's been boring that's all.

trng last night went well. 6x400m and 6x100m. think my boat is beginning to come together. the feel was good so no complains there. er... got thrown to be pacer for a few sets. it went alright but much more to be worked on also. coach also said my strokes are getting better, am pleased about it. but still, we all can do better.

no run last night but there was torture stretching instead lol. partnered up with someone else my own size (jos) lol oops i totally got distracted and left this post hanging here for a good 30mins hahaha scatter brain. i think im too flexi for my own good lol couldnt feel any of the stretch at all but ahhhh i do have tight hammies so need to roll them out more often.

back to the beginning, where it was just all of us against the world. stay with me, all of you. please stay.

getting a tad lazy to have daily updates oops

erm ok here's a quick fix for those suffering from the lack of my updates.

died during work yday lol kidding and then went to kallang and managed to snap pretty pictures of the sky. kallang is probably my favourite and my most hated place ever. but after seeing how pretty it was during gym last night. i realise

it was love at first sight, it was love at last sight. it was love at ever ever sight. 

i think i will always love kallang. brought me so many happy memories. win, lose, cry, bleed, laugh. all at kallang..

ah well. it's been a rather slow day today. office is quiet cause everyone is busy doing work.. including me, which explains this unupdated space.. time is passing wayyy too quickly. it's nearly the end of april and tmr morning concludes the last morning trng until we pass DBS and maybe our first overseas race of the year.. last chance i will get to wake up at 430am in the morning..

i just want to row happily with all of you. thats all im asking for. just to row in peace and knowing we would die for each other. can we make this memory a happy one? 

finally a breather during work. been so busy the whole of today.

cant seem to remember what my days consist of. cant remember what i did on friday omg lol oh yea. i ot-ed on friday and missed trng. went home to sleep early also cause i wasn't feeling particularly well. knocked out on bed till next morning. woke up in between also to shift outside to the sofa cause bro came home and i couldnt hog his bed. no worries, i dont mind sleeping on sofa haha.

saturday saw us endure double session without the coach cause he was caught up in personal matters. so we did technique checks and stuff. was a pleasant session la hahaha  not too bad although the weather abit the last warning LOL so erratic and weird. went home to KO after that cause really too tired. erm. also tried the mala burger from macs hahaha i love it. shared fries with mummy and spammed jap mayo huhuhu. i have been eating quite abit but idk why the numbers on the weighing scale doesnt increase. frankly, the decrease is scaring me.. not complaining, cause i look better and can fit into clothes better but. i am a little worried about myself..
had a good saturday night but didnt really stay up too late also cause there was pacing and trng the next morning. duh, what's new right....?

so sunday morning, rain is pouring~~ trng/pacing got pushed back to 8am and i ended up late also hahah road blocks everywhere due to run350. horrible planning and time management on my part also. ah well. pacing went alright, i think. much we can work on but no complains. coach wasn't pleased with our body movement so we spent the afternoon being grilled on technique again.
had team photos taken cause everyone was in the same attire hahaha. (this is one of the rare times i will post pictures cause it's really memorable!)

so hi there, here's my lovely ladies (: and of course, the prettiest people are in the front hahahah the team's 3 golden flowers LOL. jos, serene and i whooo~ it's unanimous LOLOLOL they let us be in front so it meant that they secretly agreed too hurhurhur.

went for a mini team lunch after that and then hurried home to sleep my night away again.

yay to sunday so means bro booked in and i get the bed HAHAHA sorry. it sounds very confusing. but gist of the story is mum, sis, bro and i kinda share a room but i am the temporary one. cause mummy officially took over my bed so i am bedless. hahaha yeppppppppppppp complicated family problems. too long a story to share. but it's okay, dont need bed so long i have my baby bolster haha.

so here i am on a monday evening, recording my weekends. work is ending in 12 mins and i actually feel productive today. cant wait for my cheque hurhur and a colleague is flying off to europe tonight for her honeymoon hahaha. i think i wna head to egypt for mine lol sure get scolded by everyone. wtf why wna go to such a hot place. but ah, it's alws been my dream to go there ever since i learnt and read about ancient egypt..

ohhhhh and finally, after a lengthy battle with my inner self, i gave in and bought the book. 'the fault in our stars'. reading all the quotes about it before i even read the book. now that ive finally finished the book, yes, i finished it already, in less than a day lol. i can appreciate the quotes more now and i think that there are other quotes and excerpts from the book that have been missed out.

i was good enough a person to hope that she died so she would never know that i was going, too.

sorry been pretty caught up with work today. will update later.

we will meet each other under the starry sky,
where this isn't the finale of our destiny but rather the beginning of a new chapter.
where you'll clumsily wipe the tears off my eyes
where we'll embrace and never part again.

in a parallel universe.

Home

so come and take me home
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
and let me in
just let me in
and let me leave
just let me leave this world
come on now let me leave this world
at least just for a while

i miss listening to dishwalla.. 

heartbeat

can the wishes we made on the sky lantern come true? for this team to soar? for happiness to be everlasting?

Childish

1. of, like, or appropriate to a child.

"childish enthusiasm"

 

 

countless memories at the starting point/

61ST

been counting every single day ever since although it's kinda not really counted also. blabbering nonsense again.

less than a month to dbs regatta, can we come together and triumph? i really wish to have a memorable 2014 with all of you. there's not much time left. 12months plus to Seag15, we can do it. we must do it. for the sake of all the sacrifices that we have made and for all we've given up.

i can envision us up there on the podium. i can see it, can you?

it's almost half a year into 2014..

team has fallen into disarray. for all the shitty start we have had, let's reset and make this maintenance better. let's put in even more effort for our charge towards the end of 2014. may 2015 bring a year of blessings and bounty.

everyone knows it's not how good your start is (although having a good start would be a great boost to morale), maintenance takes up about half the race (or more than half, depending on the distance) and the last charge is the one that determines your standing. if we have a good maintenance, we just need to pace ourselves and use the charge only as a last resort. can we reset? can we bring us up the complete this set/2014?

do we have what it takes to emerge victorious? even a phoenix rises from ash. even stars need some darkness to shine. so let's all be stars and shine bright, in our own special way.

yes, it isn't so much the end that matters but the journey we undertake to reach it. we will be stronger, tighter, better and much faster. we just need to keep believing.. we are all in this together, whether we like it or not. all of you mean the world to me, even though i am always snappy. my love for all of you is buried deeeeeeeeep right inside my heart and no amount of excavation can ever extract it.

midweek is here!

dragged my ass out of bed on a bright, ok wait no, i didnt say bright, i meant. er. dark wednesday morning. the sun hasnt even risen yet. the moon shines brightly on the streets below. streetlamps lighting up what would otherwise be a dark path... time check: 449am and im trudging along the path to hitch a ride from my dear teammie. my bag is heavy, my eyes are half open/closed (whichever way you like) and my slippers dragging along the concrete path.

went to nap in the bunk while waiting for my shift.. success today! managed to complete 3 triangles by my lonesome without complaining. and everyone knows i hate rowing a single kraft lol. hate. i really dislike rowing alone. i need a partner to yak to!

showered and headed to work. decided i didnt want to go into office too early so i played a game with myself. i wanted for 5 buses to pass before i boarded one to go to office hahaha ok super boliao i know..... this is how much i dread going to work LOL.. call me a loser but i think i wanna be a  housewife. to pack the house neatly and cook nice meals and play with my kids and fetch them everywhere and grocery shop and idk, do all the other housewifey stuff. hahahaha fine la im a loser lah whatever.

one little incident which ticked me off a little, while rowing, i accidentally slammed my finger against the boat and my polish chipped off a little. lol got so upset i nearly capsized but heng, i maintained my balance and stayed afloat LOL

ok bye. update after lunch. maybe. maybe not..... lemme go drink my earl grey latte now and decide what i wna eat for lunch...

You are the apple of my eye

i  know it is a tad laggy hahaha ok fine very very laggy but i finally caught youre the apple of my eye and i cried buckets omg even after the movie ended, i continued crying. #loser alert.

friday: morning trng, gym then row and thankfully run was cancelled and i went to sleep my whole afternoon away.

saturday: i forgot what we did. technique? trials? rowing and then i got adopted again by shanice and elly and we went to study / cross stitch at dhoby area and then went to thomson's habitat coffee for a late dinner. really thankful for friends like them and am soooooooo glad we got this chance to grow closer. i never imagined it but it turned out so much better than i could ever imagine.

on a side note: whoever stole my chips ahoy you watch out! may you get diarrhoea from eating it! SO PISSED OMG

sunday: trials for big boat small boat. then i headed home and slept my afternoon away as usual goodness. im such a pig.

and i dont feel like updating this space anymore. i wish to keep away. or maybe i'll update boring mundane stuff like shopping. (waiting for lb's new launch) and trng (whats new) ok bye for today.

59TH

happiness is but contentment.

water dripping down outside my office windows. i wonder if it is rain or just washings.

had we but world enough and time;

this journey is arduous. but so long youre walking with me, it does not matter the speed at which we trudge at but the process of getting to the end. to take one step at a time, to live day by day.

maybe one day it'll all be better. in time. have faith. chin up.

TGIT(54)

say hello to the long weekends! but first i must get through today..

seems pretty easy. it's 1107 already. i cant wait for work to end. cant wait for trng. cant wait to end trng. i am looking forward to getting a good sleep tonight and for tmr's holiday. ok fine there's still trng but it'll be over and done with very quickly.. cross my fingers and pray for everything to breeze through.

i hope youre happy wherever you are.

time passed so quickly today. in the blink of an eye, it's already 5pm. i cant decide if i should be happy due to this coming long weekend.. i think i am happy. and also anticipating a good friday..

this friday.. on this fateful date. i will miss you ): and youre always always on my mind.. dont for a second doubt that.

DIVVY GUN/GOLD

it's a weird wednesday..

i dont really wna curse myself but things have been going pretty smoothly. i think i could get used to this. but of course, there's always always room for improvement. i couldnt be more thankful and i dont wish to mar this perfection with complaints either.

to always be thankful for every little thing.

Better Together

There is no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard
No song that I could sing, but I can try for your heart
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things
Like a, shoebox of photographs
With sepia-toned loving
Love is the answer,
At least for most of the questions in my heart
Like why are we here? And where do we go?
And how come it's so hard?
It's not always easy and
Sometimes life can be deceiving
I'll tell you one thing, it's always better when we're together

to never ever take things for granted because they can be so easily lost.

with every stitch, a wish for you.

if all thewishes came true, you'd be a very happy person. not to mention safe, contented, and have all your dreams come true and everything will go smoothly in your life. also it'll be filled with lots of love (not necessarily from me) and joy, fun, laughter, peace.

your happiness will be everlasting.

i must have made a few thousand over stitches already. it's almost done, but not quite there yet. hang in there. i can do this.

cause when you sing to me and with me, i think you really mean it.

but whenever we're apart, i am not so sure anymore.. not sure of what you're thinking.

After lunch mini update

didnt really eat much for lunch cause the noodles that i dabao-ed was soggy and it spoilt my mood. got judged for ordering chai tea latte lol.

been super unproductive at work the whole day. i just wanna hurry end work damn it hahaha

weekends just breezed past

back to the grind on a bright monday morning.

sat: bro popped in the morning so i climbed out of bed at 6 to change and travelled all the way down with mummy to the floating platform to witness this little milestone in his life.. ugh just ran past the floating platform on fri night trng LOL wtheck.. was my first time attending a POP parade haha #noobcake was trying to look out for my bro but then er. i couldnt find him in that sea of green. wanted to look out for his tattoos but everyone has tattoos too-.- managed to find him at the end of POP and snapped a couple of pictures with him hurhur. and joke of the day: his mam' thought i was his gf.... *cues crow flying past and cawing *awkwardturtle

walked all the way back to bunk from floating platform hahaha that must have been a good 3plus km of walk, under the drizzle, how romantic..... walking ALONE ): mum and bro took a cab home D:

sat am shift was kayak/db so i missed it. aftnn sess was trials again and video taping hurhurhur. it's good that we're improving bit by bit. crew list for DBS is out....

shanice elly adopted me again on a saturday afternoon and we headed to AMK hub to grocery shop. had to enforce some law and order on the both of them again.. easily distracted haha and then they accompanied me to buy a pair of glitter jelly flats from Rubi at $5 WAHWAHWAH hahaha best buy of the day. super love the flats even though the two of them judged me for it. went to town to look for jos and her sister for abit. dinnered at tomyumkungfu @ boat quay and py came along too cause she had no dinner plans haha. was rather satisfied with the food :D it's defo much better than mookata's. altho i heard they are one and the same. but wtvs lah. YOLOed my way through saturday evening and only reached home at 12mn........ #lastwarning haha tamp is so far from everywhere.

sunday was trials in the morning followed by technique check in the afternoon.. didnt do much the whole day and just caught up with my sleep the whole aftnn/evening. got home at 330 and by the time i decided to wake up, it was alr 7 hahaha. watched green lantern with sister and sinned for dinner hahaha thanks sissy for buying my dinner :p i mean er, thanks for the treat cause you didnt buy it, it got delivered.

had a good sunday night :') always always thankful for peaceful nights. i feel rather blessed even though i know it's quite temporary.. to always hold and cherish the precious moments.. life's a mix of good and bad moments. the good moments seldom come by but when they do, we should recognise them for what they are. to always always live for the good moments.

TGIF

the skies look kinda gloomy right now. the only thing keeping me going and making me stay put in my seat is the fact that it's already 1656 and in 1hr4mins time, ill be flying out of my seat and into the train and embarking on a 15min stroll into the heart of kallang.

had lunch w colleagues this afternoon. someone asked me how long have i been doing this. by 'this', i assume that it was of db/rowing that was being spoken of. i mumbled 11 years.. and gasps of surprise went all around the table. and then someone asked, so long already not boring meh? immediately i answered no, not at all. i cant believe it either. kallang has been my home for the past 11 years. bane of my life, love hate relationship with it.

anyway, bought a new nail polish from chinaglaze. don't be a luna-tic. a pretty holographic colour, i cannot wait to paint it on. heard and read reviews it looks prettier and more holo under direct sunlight, so i guess it'll be put to the test this weekend.. so i guess i wont be a lunatic this weekend.

on another note, little bro is popping this sat! and mummy and i are going to witness it huehuehue er yes i am skipping trng for it... i only have one brother so i better savour all the epic moments. so proud of you. wasnt too long ago that we sent you in during your enlistment day. time passes so quickly! youre growing up too fast, actl we all are.

ps. happy intl siblings day so hi mei hi brian ee :D

weekends are here. i feel expectant of the new week already and cannot wait. ok maybe im thinking too much. but anyways, one step at a time. one day at a time. slowly but surely.

you always say everything will work out fine. and everything will be okay in the end. i hope so. i guess so. i want it to be so.

brain dead. so mind fucked. so tired. i wish i could unfeel it. but how could i?

are we gna be ok are we are we are we?

so what

trial results are out. i am just glad i didnt rank last. the run saved me and gave me my much needed points. so now im ranked 3rd fastest in the team for the run but so what? if i cant keep it up, they'll take it as a fluke. they dont take me seriously anyway. they'll always find excuses to put me down.

most humans are sour grapes. and not many can find it in themselves to be truly happy for others when others finally better themselves..

but i do have true friends, and they know who they are (: 

yuppppppp im back here again.

i feel. numb. calm. empty. not sure if it's a good thing or not. one thing's for sure. i know who makes me happy, still.

oops haha been meaning to post something since i plonked down in my office seat but guess i was too distracted..

gymed before rowing last night. rowing was a very killer 15sets of 1.5 on 1.5 off. but the feeling was good so all is well i guess..? ahhh thursday means chicken rice day and i cant wait to eat lunch in 20mins lol.

dressed very properly today and mum complimented me LOL. speak of the chicken rice, it's here..... hahaha wtf.

i can never ever make up for the past but i hope i will be able to become a better person in the future.

reading the divergent trilody stirs in me emotions, thoughts, feelings and questions. doubts that i never knew i had. am i really a good person?

mini update

today's mid week already. wed means we have double sessions. kayaking in the morning at ungodly hours and then normal trng in the evening.

woke up at an unearthly hour 425 then lazed in bed till 435. thankfully common sense made me pack my bag the night before alr so i only had to wash up and head off. elly picked shimin and i up at 5 (FREAKING) am at the bus stop. haha my kayak shift was at 645 lah but idm gg early since i get a free ride and er i can cont napping at kallang anyway. so i became a hobo right outside our bunk.. napped for about an hour plus before i went to row 3 triangles with peixuan and thanking my lucky stars we didnt capsize even with all the tongshing boats zipping around.

had salad for lunch....... yea trying to be healthy. didnt feel too well this morning also. stomach churning soooooo badly and i actl puked a little of last night's dinner out while brushing teeth wtf. i think this is my body's way of telling me that i am allergic to early morning trngs???

received a quote on insta, shanice tagged me.

''the people experiencing the most pain tend to be the ones who are always trying to make others smile.''

how true. how true. i guess you dont wish for others to feel pain the way you do maybe?

i think abt escaping everyday.
your absence stings the worst.

Too Dark Tonight

I'm outside in the cold
Thought stars will bring the light
I should have learned by now
They just come out at night
The things they always say
The tunnels lead to light
It's something I don't see
Cause it's too dark tonight
(Tonight, tonight, ..)

Let go now
Let go now
It's all for you

And you give, all you got, but it's never enough
When you've got, nothing left
It all just gets too much

Too much, too much..
It all just gets too much

Too much

adrift in calm waters but how long will it be before the waves pull me down again.

will you still save me? can i count on it?

46th

next friday would be a public holiday cause it's Easter. and it's the 18th.... of april.

something stirs in the recesses of my mind. something far away, something that happened long ago. something i can never make up for. something i could never justify.

i am sorry. i really am. sorry for not being brave.will i ever be forgiven?

i was enchanted to meet you~ maybe i'll see you someday, somewhere far away.

LONG WAY HOME

been rather hooked onto gareth emery's album thanks to recommendation from friends. think i love the songs with lyrics most. vocal trance. but his songs make me sad because the lyrics to the songs remind me of you. wts am i saying. everything reminds me of you. i cannot take this ugh. so tired so tired so tired.

someone tell me ill be ok. we will be ok. it will be ok. pls someone lie to me.

noone can save me, not when im running headlong into self destruction.

i am on a train, the train is at full speed. we're on track now but what happens when we reach the end of the line?

i dislike myself

day 45

everything is almost the same. everything is different. alternate reality. i cant choose which i want to belong to. can i be delusional?

Sing to me

like you mean it. sing words from songs you didnt write. lie to me and make me happy. i wish to be happy. even if it's not real. i just want to forget. i just want to be happy even if it means doing the wrong things. can i be selfish?

When the world falls apart
I will hold you in my arms like a friend

When the world's unkind
I will make you smile
I will stay right by your side until the end

Through the dark of night
When no hope's in sight
When the walls start closing in, I'll be your friend

When the world falls apart
If you should ever feel so broken that you can't go on
If your world falls apart
I will hold you in my arms like a friend

until the end.

havent updated much today hehe sorry. was busy with work the whole day. my work table is in a mess right now. so many documents omg i wanna faint and i wanna burn them all.

double sessions over the weekends. heavy heavy rain early morning and dear partner and i got drenched haha wth. paddling k2 in the midst of a storm is really challenging! thankfully we didnt capsize and even managed to clock 2.5 triangles hahaha. had super ugly hair and everyone was freezing in the rain lol. afternoon session was technical paddling so yea pretty alright. still have more to work on for my stroke. lunched/sinned at TPY with shanice, elly and yujia lol. please dont bother trying level 3 spice for macs. it sucks hahahaha i think mcspicy is still the best.. so yea #loyaltomcspicy4eva anyways managed to grocery shop and enforced law and order onto elly shanice. those two forever deviating from original goals lol. bought ham and snacked on it while waiting for them to be done. hahahaha after that it was off to creamier WHEEEEEE yea been sinning alot but it's ok haha they keep saying i can afford it LOL that's not the point.. and then did YOLO stuff again lol went to do our hair. shanice permed hers and trimmed, elly trimmed hers and i thinned mine haha yay i do not look like a mushroom anymore :p
had retarded conversation with the hairstylists. lol i guess theyre really intrigued by us and our lifestyle. haha that's just a nice way to put it. in actual fact they must be thinking wtf these girls siao on.. got prize take meh?

sunday: video session x trials
am was 500m x 2
pm was 200m x 2
was not bad. rather pleased i guess but as usual, loads more to work on. i am sure we can do it if we stick together.

back to boring monday again.only thoughts of you keep me going.

But as long as you are with me, there's no place I'd rather be
I would wait forever, exulted in the scene
As long as I am with you, my heart continues to beat
If you gave me a chance I would take it
It's a shot in the dark but I'll make it
Know with all of your heart, you can't shame me
When I am with you, there's no place I'd rather be
Make it everlasting so nothing's incomplete
It's easy being with you, sacred simplicity
As long as we're together, there's no place I'd rather be

i thought i was doing fine and then i wasnt again.

more than anything

YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU ONLY YOU. ALWAYS YOU.

Watching the sky light fall to black
Feeling like the lights never coming back, no
When it’s dark in the snow
I will be here, I’ll be here

And its all for you
Every spark in every flame
All for you
And all the stars they know your name

Making it count
Holding hoping
Never enough
One last moment

As the stars die out
We’re burning and it’s beautiful
Cause it all comes down
See the sky fall down

I’m dancing in the flames tonight
The fire heals the pain
As the stars die out
We’re burning in a beautiful rage

wishing, waiting, yours for the taking

Soldier

Listening to a new song right now. chanced upon it and it makes perfect sense to me. and it reminds me of you, once again.

cant stop this feeling. ugh whyyyy am i so weak?

“You don’t get over grief, you just get more used to it.”

yea i guess the above quote is true. more true than anyone can ever imagine. 

MILLION YEARS

and all songs remind me of you. i relate all sorts of lyrics to you. especially 'U'

I just close my eyes and all I saw was you.

I’m gonna remember you
For a million years
Always forever

i know i will. 

we're almost there and nowhere near it. all that matters is we're going.

0.o

what the shit hahaha the stats for yesterday. seriously. LOL.

listening to top 20 songs of tomorrowland 2014 now lol wtf and tmrland hasnt even been held. they siao hahaha but some are quite nice...

trng yday was -__________- one of the later nights at kallang, no thanks to individual 500m lol wtf hahahahahah ok la the rest did tap along at scheduled intervals but still HAHAHAHAH cui is me. thankfully laoban cancelled the run. which means er tonight run x2 as hard.

just got into office hehe :X so no updates yet, but why are there views already lol dont you all actl heed my advice..? brb. making my bfast in office now..............

ok back haha dipping biscuit into my steaming hot cuppa milo yummers hehe and er still listening to top20tmrlandsongs lol wtf. ok gotta do work now. omg.

When my own words fail me

I saw me
through you
and for once,
just once,
I felt
worth it.
You saw you
through me
and for once,
just once,
you felt
home.
- Tyler Knott Gregson

Home is where the heart is. But my heart is here. So i must be home. [You] sigh, turn your head, and is quiet. Hi honey. I'm home. I'm home.
- The Time Traveller's Wife.

You be the anchor that keeps my feet on the ground
I'll be the wings that keep your heart in the clouds

woah done with that task yay super accomplished even though i nearly went blind wtf.

so proud of you

things are so different now compared to then but still i am thankful :')

some things never change.

let's make this fleeting moment last forever

So, tell me what you're waiting for?
I'm gonna keep it frozen here forever,
There's no regretting anymore.
It's worth the wait, even so far away.
I'm making the night mine until the day I die
No lights to brake when you're hanging by fate
You know what it feels like when you're dancing blind
All alone, just the beat inside my soul
Take me home, where my dreams are made of gold
In the zone where the beat is un-controlled.
Meet me under shining lights,
I've been waiting right here all my life
Feelings you can't deny that you're living, open up your eyes
And I just wanna sink into your crazy laughter
Come on make me feel until the pain don't matter
Every second here makes my heart beat faster
Finally think I found what I'm chasing after.

:'( WHY ARE YOU STILL SO NICE TO ME.

thank you for everything. for giving in. for taking. for my nonsense. for everything. all the things. all the time. always.

hanging on - ellie goulding

You know we can get away
Because I'm calling your name
Every day I feel this pain
But you just turn and walk away

I just can't keep hanging on, to you and me
I just don't know what is wrong, with you and me

if it ever gets too much to bear.. no it wont. i will press on.

FIGHT FOR YOU

I know you know it, you know it
But you can't choose who's inside
But if you just show it, let me know it
Then I'll fight for you tonight
I'll fight for you
I'll fight for you tonight

ok i did it hehe so the phone has a pretty cover now lol it was dark blue lah but now it's so pretty and so pam LOL not that i am saying that im pretty but yknow. aiya you dk nvm.

lunch was alright. finished all the ingredients and left the rice.. too much rice already. CS-ing my life away. did one cp like finally. now time to start on the others that i have left. lol still plugged into my phone and listening to songs that i just loaded in yday. mmm some song lyrics make so much sense. or maybe im thinking too much into the songs haha it shld be my over imaginative mind thinking too far again. LOL what's new.

taking one step at a time.

fade into me

fade into you.

lunch time in a minute. oh no wait. it's now! hahah cant wait to zhng my phone cover with washi tape. cant believe i only thought of it now. wtf. slow iz me.

MID-WEEK

so fast mid week already haha er yea thats cause i let mon and tues slip away just like that lol. ultra late for work this morning. only got my ass in like 30mins ago :S then ive been diligently doing work. no choice cause im really lagging behind and if i wna leave this company then i better get my shit settled before i handover to the new girl cause yea cant leave too much shit for her to clear right...

trials was  last night. i didnt do exceptionally well but i did improve on my stations so thats whats impt i guess. the run was a major improvement that even i didnt expect :O lol compared to my shitty prev trials hahahahaha it is madness.i dropped nearly 2mins off 2.4 lol wtf was i doing last trial. oh right, recovering from my depression D: not that i am totally okay now but i guess more of accepting and keeping the faith for the future cause nothing is set in stone and anything can change anytime. ok consoling myself here. pls give chance.

improved on pullups by 2 haha damn difficult to pull myself up even with the decrease in body weight lol this year has been er... pretty. unstable? lol from first trials to now, my bodyweight dropped by drastic 6-7 kg lol although not complaining. but i did lose strength too hahaha better work harder. alright will update the fitness blog soon / tmr / friday hahaha idk man. cant decide and i have other things to do... like my cps. they're calling me now.

will update later. im feeling quite. normal today. shall think of what to eat for lunch. having said that, my appetite isnt back  yet. ughhhhhhhhhh! nvm.

tuesday haha been plugged into my phone the whole day listening to the new songs lol super drifting off while at work. i swear idk where my motivation to drag my ass off the bed is coming from.

trials later haha will update the fitness blog that i share with baobei after trials lol i promised her and if i dont do it, i foresee some nagging hahahaha. hopefully i do better this time around cause really, the previous trial sucked so bad i never want to see the results again LOL

just when i thought things were going swimmingly well.

i am drowning again.

All the Way

I know you hold back but just let it go,
'Cause I just won't stand to watch you walk alone,
Don't be afraid, you're not on your own
As long as you know we'll be alright
Still I'm praying that you change your mind,
I'll be okay
'Cause you'll come around eventually

just the thought of you.

I was stumbling right on the edge
You pulled me back, for one last dance
Yeah, I was lost on the darkest road
I need your light to lead me home

tonight, tonight, tonight.

trials tonight. been mia haha to mental prep. but everytime i come back here, the stats mind fuck me lol. why is there an increase in the stats even when i havent been updating lol this is freaking me out.

anyways gave in to temptation and bought 'divergent' the book lol it's nothing like the movie and i cant decide which one i like more but ah well, one cant have everything in life.
CS is coming along fine so no complains abt that lol need alot more effort to finally complete it i think but somehow some way, i will complete it.

movied with py on sunday aft trng: Capt America hahaha we were overly excited i swear... lol. dinner was at concetto at cathay and then we had waffles + ice cream at createaf. oh we also managed to take picture with ironman and pepper potts lol wtf haha some cosplay going on at cathay so we were in luck. if you have my insta, you would have seen the picture lol. er they handmade the costumes so it is *jaw drops*

monday mc-ed to slack away shhhhhhhhh dont tell people. weird stomach pains came back. and now im back in office after a good morning hehe.

happy april fool!!