The year

will inevitably come to an end on 11:59:59pm today and 2010 will begin.

Certain decisions made this year has caused me to repeat a year in poly and therefore am unable to graduate with my batch mates but I am indeed lucky to have a coach that allows me to row and continue in the team despite my bad academics. 2010 will be a year that I will leave my teenage years behind, all those stupid mistakes and wrong decisions will also be left but the consequences of some of my actions will never be erased and will instead follow me wherever I go. All I hope and want is to learn from my mistakes (which experience tells me, I never ever learn!) and be a better person.

Some achievable resolutions for the new year include:

1. Staying happy and this is the number one and most important because if I can't even make myself happy, the chances of making someone else happy is even lesser.
2. Loving myself more, this includes not punching the wall when I am mad which causes me to have swollen knuckles and fat hands :/ and if I can't even love myself, how do I spread the love to others?
3. Being a better daughter and I can start by shouting at my MMDearest lesser. I am such a vulgar person that sometimes I don't even think twice before I hurl vulgarities and I know that hurts my MM's feelings, I feel bad and I know I can do something about it so I will, in the new year!
4. Less vulgarities but it seems a little unachievable therefore I shall limit myself to maybe 10 a day hahaha when I can currently do like maybe 100 in half a day now!
5. Be less self-occupied. Instead of thinking so much about my physical aspects, maybe I could start thinking more about my projects!

Forgetting about making anymore resolutions, half of them don't come true anyway. Other simpler resolutions include those superficial ones like losing weight and finally maybe hitting my dream weight which apparently isn't very ideal to others, achieving my muscle definition which I can't achieve without losing the fats first so don't blame me for wanting to lose weight hahahahaha and also maybe try to grow long hair or at least start to make up my mind about which hairstyle I want, not forgetting that I also want to try and save some money for a nice vacation somewhere over the rainbow. Oh and also, wishing that I will become more intellectual or maybe at least sound more intellectual when I blog. But tell me, how can I sound intellectual when the most recent book I read was a Lizzy McGuire series? Did I even get the spelling right? Ooooh, I also maybe want to try to start typing in proper english but I am afraid that will be unattainable because, as much as I am ashamed to say it, I will, laziness gets the better of me all the time :/

New year, new commitments.
I guess I really need to buck up if I don't want to be a failure. Need to manage my time well to juggle between killer CCAs and stressful studies. Sometimes I just want to quit school and go out to work but where can I go with only an 'O' level cert? I certainly do not have the capabilities of opening a blogshop (and besides I think the clothes I sell will be quite quirky and noone will ever want to buy it and the blogshop will just go bust!) and managing all the money, clothes blah blah how tedious is that when thinking about it makes my want to scratch my hair off my scalp!


Peering into the bag and trying to see what 2010 will bring and at the same time wishing I were King of the world and Queen of her heart.


A girl coming 20 still hopelessly in love with another girl and I know this will work out if I put my heart and soul into it. Wait, I already have and still am.

Been so long since I updated

Havent been up to anything productive lately. The last time I updated seems so long ago and I am very tempted to write like many paragraphs of what I have been up to but I feel like there is no point.

My mind is already almost completely made up. I am gonna join Adidas Sundown Full Marathon, as for the Ultra, I might join that when I have gone completely crazy.

New shoes as Xmas present from The Girl <3 and I made her give it to me in advance but ever since then it's been sitting inside its shoebox. I have not brought it out for a stroll. Kinda feels like I can't bear to bring it out for fear of spoiling it or making it smelly. Love the shoe too much! Best part of all, it's bright orange. The whole freaking shoe except for the soles of course (ingenious because I simply wouldn't step on it if it were orange!) is bright orange! I am so so so extremely excited about this shoe and I cannot wait to bring it out but I have got to get over the 'I-can't-bear-to-spoil-it-in-any-way' mindset first. Take a look!






Comm meeting/Xmas winterwonderland with the ladies and guys-.-

Love all of you, yes, Suanling the idiot is included even though we caught her at Ion with her 'father'! What an ass.

Michelle's 21st birthday bash was almost a big success heheh considering the fact that Yiling the shorty got herself drunk with help from me and Yunn Sin (who was also freaking red faced btw!) and she(Yiling I mean) even proclaimed me as the Love of her Life. Doesn't it show how gone she was hahahahahahaha and a long way from coming back to Earth. Hohohohoho.

Awesome partnership with Shiya hehehehe take a look!



Tadahhhh! Anyway, Weng Shiya, Me love You much even though you are gonna graduate soon and you keep untagging your unglam photos on FB! No! We are in this together and we glam and unglam together okay! Stop being so evil! And also, we are gonna keep trying our jump shots(since it keeps failing!) and keep taking our favourite(and gonna be famous soon!) pose together hehehehe.

Bernice the Bitch! (:

Hurry start packing your room so you can go for training tmr. We need to work harder and train harder! (: Love you so much you also don't know lor.

Anyway, missed out on mentioning the tanning session with Gwen hahahahaha we went on a Monday after work, early in the morning where I had my dosage of Hotness, well there was this girl who was so damn hot in a yellow bikini, and she had a hot ass and well, 8 pack if you can believe it and also a pair of neverending legs hehehehe and got ourselves burnt so badly, well, I burnt quite badly and had blisters on my tummy ): And Gwen's skin was so slow reaction hahaha her burn appeared like a few days later :/


Actually, I have plenty more to say but I have decided to keep it for next time so I wont run out of things to blog about, if I have the time to blog that it. Trying to save money for a vacation. Should start making my new year resolutions(though I am pretty sure I wont keep to it.) as well. And uhm, get a new hair cut when I finally make up my mind, I can't seem to decide whether I want it short or grow it out long. As usual, it looks like a clump of nonsense and it's ruining my already ruined image. But good news would be, I can finally tie my hair. Gosh, I think this is already the longest hair length that I have had in like 2 years hahahaha.

Oh it seems I did write quite alot huh hahahahahah couldnt resist it, oops too bad!

Trngs and trngs and some time to play.

Trainings has been alright? Have I blogged about training already? My life is getting boring. I am not as intellectual as I want to sound. I sound so preoccupied with myself. Am just like a spoilt brat.

Tuesday was alright, just that the warm up run almost killed all of us. Sun was being all heartless and bitchy. Think it hates us or something and wanted to burn us all to death. Bench press was excitingggggg ^^ Uh medicine ball was a killer as usual. Beezees came back on Tues. Went tanning with Michelle and Sam at HP2, bnj's rather fattening as I gained nearly 2kg after eating it :/ Shall swear off ice cream for a week or sth ): ): ): I wanna try the dark chocolate orange from Haagen Daaz though... Gymed a second time in NP with SnM and nearly died. Muscles are aching like mad from morning's training.

Wednesday, slacked a whole day at home while beezees went to school. Slept when she got back from school. Dinnered and then movie-ed. Caught Storm Warriors, shi shuai de lor.


Sea rowing on Thurs. Hahahaha was alright luhhhhhh. Technique technique!! Keep reminding yourself! I know I am naggy but it's for your own good! Sushi buffet with beezees, sam and michelle. Hahahahaha and M dabaoed the food for her Yuenboiboi, omgggg first time I see such thingssss and I was actually the accomplice. Went to play l4d after the buffet and the feeling of puking came. Met bel and then sam and walked around. Apparently, there are sales everywhere but no mommy, no money. Maybe got beezees then got money? I wish...

l4d-ing now actually but I feel like puking, therefore this update. Night.

Guess what came to stay?

So cute right? Anyway, beezees is back with Domokun. What shall I name it? Mmm, brownie? Okay and that shit is the real thanggggg so it cost like 30bucksssss or sth. Beezees got her whole transformers set-.- Expppppppppp lika mad, we could have gone for a good meal hahahahha. Sushi buffet on Thursday! Yippee.

Hate it

when you people try to sugar coat your words. I don't need it, heck, we don't need it. I don't fucking need your pity. I am better off alone anyway. Screw you la. If you are out to do that, I can ruin your life too. Okay it's just me thinking too much.

First trng was such a bitch. The sun was a merciless killer and I got easily agitated. Sitting behind made me realise that most people don't even go full blade? Like okay chill, I can't blame you all cause you are supposedly new and fresh (: (: (: BUT isn't it high time to start reminding yourselves? :/ Whatever, to hell with you if you think I am too harsh. If you think I am harsh, remind yourself that losing is even harsher.

Back to myself, I feel lonely at trainings but not now, not so soon but soon enough I think. I know I will feel lonely in time to come.

Life sucks. Someone get me outta here!

Beezees, hurry back pleaseeeee. I got loads to unload ): ): ):

Shagged spells pam, shiya and gwen

Hahaha three of us act yi ge smart want to go work overnight all as some book binder and here i am stuck in shiya's house before we head out to sentosa. hopefully we get some good weather. please please let me have some good weather. i need to tann my tummy and pray that the heat will burn my fats and i need to tann my thunderthighs tooooo. one of the disadvantages of being a db paddler is that one thigh tends to be darker than the other thigh.

oooooh shiyas daddy is quite handsome and her mother is pretty lor. hahahahahaha. me mummy is so fat and cute (:

sissy decided to be nice

so she lent me her laptop after suffering 10mins of unbearable bugging by me hehe. sometimes i feel that she is older than me and anyway guess what? my dearest little brother is freaking taller than me already. omg i am such a loser. guess who is gonna be the shorty this new year. life sucks, i am depressed already. so people, if you think i am tall, take a look at my siblings, then my cousin. hahahaha i am so short and fat when compared to them but but but i got the muscles that they dont have hehehehe ^^

did some community work this morning. i better get some good karma please. i need all the karma i can get to grow taller. i need to grow taller or i would become the laughing stock.

holidays are here. in need of some tanning. mm starting to peel from the marathon. think i took too long to complete, thats why i got burnt. omg, such a loser-.-

Need to start

learning how to make cupcakes first then I can start decorating it hehehehe who would wanna try my baking? Swear to God it's edible. But then, if I made such pretty stuff, how could anyone bear to eat it!



Lunchbox anyone?

Pictures ripped off the world wide web.

Am currently bored

so i have decided to update this space again even though i cant seem to find anything to blog about. okay, i am lame like that, so what right hehehe

okay uhm lets see, i caught GI Joe (yes, finally i know right) yesterday afternoon at bee's house and completed my portfolio for my gems. holidays are coming but i dont feel happy. bee is leaving for msia. hope she brings me more presents. xmas is coming. i am broke as shit. ahh fmylife.

will update again. i need to spam my blog.

A sigh of relief

i breath as my presentation ended.

i guess this is the end of a term and the much awaited holidays are here already. i am scared to go back for training as the faces that i want to see might not be there. they might be, but for how long will they be? i cannot expect them to stick around and make me feel better. they should move on to better things in life and i wish them all the best.

soon begins a new season with the younger faces. what are we all training for? it really seems so ridiculous that we clock so many hours during training and then it all boils down to 2mins for a 300m race, 3mins for a 500m race and 6mins for an 800m race.

teamwork, all the sweat and tears, they wont be for nothing.

So nice to have completed it with (:

YAY MAX I COMPLETED IT AND I DID IT WITH BEEZEES HEHEHEHE

Proj submission over!

Liberation is here. Did quite an alright job for my project I think. Yay to life again. Hahahahahahahha.

Ran the full marathon and although I nearly wanted to give up like HALFWAY, I didn't. Okay that's all for the marathon part. Will train for sundown if B wants to go and I am definitely running next year's SCSM again.

Slacking coupled with looming project submission

means that pamela ee is a dead duck. i have what uhm today thursday friday saturday sunday to try and rush my project but knowing me today (wednesday) will be a slacking day because there is no school and i am simply too unmotivated to do it on a non school day. yes i am in school (which explains this post) but i am not in my lab and am in NP instead hehehehe. i hope to rush everything by thursday and friday and complete my boards on saturday. attendance sucks and i need to go to school everyday for the next few weeks before i can pass my module. i simply cannot flunk year 2 again. friday and saturday, hopefully i will be motivated enough to chiong this proj. i dont aim to do well, just good enough to get c or d. sunday is definitely out of the question because i signed up to go through hell. imagine 42.195km under the hot sun. think i need shades and a cap. i pray my shoes wont give up on me. let's make a bet on how many blisters i will get. i am thinking maybe one on each toe... thats already the best case scenario okay.

uhm been so long since i last did anything to my hair. what should i do to it now. i wanna grow it long but apparently b feels like shitting in her pants after seeing me in pictures with fake long hair which happens to either belong to bernice or gwen by the way. i really want to grow it long but i am lazy to and besides, i feel short hair suits me better. i dont think i look nice with long hair. i need to do something exciting to my hair!

two days of clubbing is taking a toil on my body. i havent even blogged a chunk of my post regatta feeling and by the time i do it, it will be too belated. anyway, clubbing was fun hahahahaahha with people like michelle who showed me her shuffling like awesome oh wow. it's really nice to go with people you are comfortable with and can laugh with and at hahahahaha if b didnt go, i dont think i would have gone. clubbing brings out a different side of people, this side that you never knew existed. hahahaha oh and super lambo tastes nice! okay i sound like a noob here.

will stop adding words to this chunk of rubbish. off to fb nowwwwwwwwwwwwww

oh yeaaa did i mention that i am as sick as something that is sick... damn it. my throat is dry at night and causes me problems with swallowing. then it is filled with phelgm in during the days and cause problems with breathing. my phlegm is thick and green and at times bloody. oh can anyone save me!