I Can Resist Anything Except Temptation.

Just fall into me and I will fall into you

2011-12-14T21:47:00.000-08:00

I thought it'd be easy but no one believes me.

Good grades didn't assure me a good future because laziness got the better of me. Decided that CCA held a higher place than studies and rejected ip into TJC. Look where I am now? Nowhere :/ it's nit that I don't train hard but no matter how hard I train, there's alway someone out there better than me. Passion can't bring me anywhere in life. Am not going to make the same mistake in life again. I need a degree to get somewhere. That shit piece of paper means so much here. I screwed up half my way in getting it. Nothing else will obstruct me now.

Grhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2011-07-07T21:23:00.000-07:00

its been a long while since i last posted here haha kinda cant be bothered with keeping up a blog anymore and not much has been going on in my life anyway. been watching online shows and training. went for 2 overseas races already and achieve some stuff which is all good. POLITE came and went again, sigh i really have no idea how to feel. sp is always a part of me. for now and for always. okay

I REALLY NEED A JOB. LOBANG PLEASE.

finally

2011-03-20T09:14:00.000-07:00

after 4 polites with only a bronze to show for it in 2008, 4 june races with only a silver to show for it in 2008, 3 regattas that we qualified for grands and a bronze in opens mixed in 2007, 3savas with a few medals for mixed, and 3 mr500 which i dont rmb much except for sp having 2x20crew boat in 2009, 4ivp jackets (all of different design), 4ivp shirts(dark blue, red, black and gray) i am moving on. Thank you spdb for having been 1/5 of my life. 4 long years. It's time!!!!!!!!! To move on (:

yet another race

2011-03-20T09:06:00.000-07:00

its over and official the last ivp race that i am gna row for sp sigh part of me wants to move on yet another part wishes to stay on and continue rowing with them. My first team. I can be considered the first proper batch in a long time to come. Back then when michelle zakkiyah were all still inside. We were so happy rowing together. The 10 of us, yunn sin bernice shiya gwen denise anni suanling and i. Then slowly but surely, others moved on to better thgs in life. And now evryones got their own thgs to do and i am happy too cause fibally its my turn to move on. But my heart still stays right in the very boat the very first time we won.

Because I thought

2011-03-14T06:15:00.000-07:00

so this is march and there is me sitting here nursing another heartache once more. please not let it be the curse of the march. sometimes all i want is just to be happy is it that difficult to achieve? or is it me wanting too much.
so these are morning trainings starting again and there is a someone telling me that she wants to spend her time with me too but i dont see how we can spend time together unless she allows me to go look for her because there is no way she can look for me. trainings school trainings school too much responsibilities for a 21 year old to bear. too young for us to carry such a heavy burden.
so this is me, sitting here, thinking wishing waiting hoping against hope that it will turn out well somehow

TGIF

2011-01-28T00:31:00.000-08:00

another week down and another week nearer to submission and i can safely say i may complete it but it wont be quality work because even after all these years of chionging like a mad bitch for the last part of project, i am still not learning. i am still blogging when i am supposed to be doing my work god damn it, i am good.

met rachel for lunch today awwww and CNY's next week btw, i have truly outdone myself and i have no idea what the fuck i can do to salvage all these wasted time ooooooohhhhhhhhh i will never ever learn. i just wanna eat sleep gym train all day all night day in day out week after week.

Some work done

2011-01-24T23:56:00.000-08:00

like what the title says, i did some work so at least there is something to show for it hah right now anthony ronn and khalis are playing a stupid game that doesnt allow then to use the work 'fuck' 'you' or 'eh' hahahaha its damn funny and they are playing ronn like shit hahaha omg damn funny hahahahah its cracking me up and am hungry now but class only ends at like 6 which is 2 more hours to go. and she finally finally brought the lollipop to school and is going to find a chance to eat it but no, i dont think she will find any time to hahahah so funny and the lollipop was given since halloween.

okay yesterday was dinner with the nteam ladies at kenny rogers and it was so great to finally see them again after so long and me cant wait to start rowing again hahahahaha being a fat blob recently, sighs been running but results are not showing D: horrible hahaha and ying says that your legs are nice, see i told you so lorrrrrrr.

i need more breaks than the ones i have now

2011-01-23T19:47:00.000-08:00

i need a break. i want to get away from DLA once and for all, if i continue with this course i think i might just die. it's 24 days into the new year and about 6 more months to anyone's freedom. i need to stop thinking and start doing something like lets say apply for something immediately after i finish my exams and i cannot find it in myself to be fully saturated with hmmm contentment? not to say that i am not but i feel there is more to be filled up? okay am talking rubbish right now.

am happy but not saturated with happiness sigh i want to grow fat on happiness and contentment i want to glow from within and the looming deadline of this shit project is gloomy with no sunshine at all. i cannot see that light at the end of the tunnel and it really sucks because i am usually not so pessimistic grhh plants are making me have a headache! i need a chouchoubolster to smell and feel happy with gahhhh. sketch up not going well at all, my colouring is machiam shit and its so so so simple D: where's the rahrah that accompanies a good job done? is my sketch up not good enough?????????????????????

need to get started on my remaining sections (2 to be exact) my details (3 oh goddamnit 3motherlord sections) and also the a1 boards and chinese new year is coming so it means lotsa printing shops are closed ahhhhhhhh how the fuck do i solve the printing issue damna it.

rant over.

30 more days and it will all be over

2011-01-17T23:14:00.000-08:00

this 4 yr misery shitholey diploma that i was supposed to get like a year ago. maybe finally in 30plus days i will be able to graduate and move on to better things in life like let's say teaching? or something sighhh but then i really want to be an air stewardess hahahahaha okay fine go on and laugh at me for being fat then grhhhh i am still going to try??? or maybe i wont since my mind is fickle and i am afraid of failures sighhh

i just got my ass to school 3hours after lessons started and then barely 2 hours into the class, my mind has just drifted to the gym omg seriously i cannot wait to finally leave school behind and start camping in the gym.

2010 passed way too quickly. so many things i have not tried in my 20 years of life and now 2011 is another journey into my 21st gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh dont wanna grow old

its the same old shit over and over again

2011-01-16T22:58:00.000-08:00

there was a portfolio submission today and me being me, the unchanged person, woke up at only 1030 when there happens to be school at 9 sighh and the best part was that i was already up since 7? when 62 texted me and idk why i cannot get my ass out of bed on time even when she isnt beside me hahaha i remember mummy coming into my room and smacking my butt with the clothes hanger but i just pretended i was asleep. doubt i will ever change for the better, even i dont believe in myself hahaha what is the world coming to hahahahaha well, my world.

i really need to find something nice/worthy/fulfilling to do in life if not i will just continue being this aimless soul that i am. i have huge plans for my body and it mostly involves pieces of tattoos but i am a jobless usless human and i cant dig money from anywhere sigh why cant it rain money on me.

i keep moping about my life when i can actually do something about it okay thats it. i am gonna apply for relief teaching yay and hopefully temasek sec wants me and i can go the the canoeing teacher in charge wah grand plans but who knows if it will come true grhh

Discipline please

2011-01-10T21:21:00.000-08:00

i really really need more time to do idk what. everyday i go to school or when i actually do go to school, i get distracted and i waste my time. when will i ever really learn sighhhh i guess it really helps to have a passion in what you do because right now i am stuck, i want to finish a 4year dip in doing something that i have no passion for and that sucks because i am aimless and i float around in class and when i finally get my ass to class, all i wanna do is to run away to the gym or the sports complex to either run or do weights i really cant be rooted to class hahaha i am the black sheep of DLA i am sorry classmates you people are really wonderful, i am just being an idiot, as usual.

new year and many new things to do and its rather exciting but the future is all uncertain i mean like i dont know what i wanna do after i graduate with shitty results, i cant even go anywhere damn it but 62 gave me some advice and asked me to be a teacher but i think that i cant even handle myself much less handle kids sigh they will turn out to be rotten just like me D: sometimes i wish that i was born with a gold spoon in my mouth and i wouldnt have to worry about money or whatever and i can just be happy and spend money freely yet 62 claims it's about the self fulfilment and blahblah yes its true but at this point of time, there is nothing much i want to fulfil. i want to start learning new things but i am afraid to i like to stick to the norm.

i dislike school i dislike being aimless i dislike not knowing what to do with my life. i know i have so much to live for but at this point in time, i am feeling low and i doubt there is anything that can make me happy sigh not even a good session of weights in the gym no, not even that. this feeling sucks too bad.

i know i sound depressed but i am not lah just wallowing in self pity and going around in circles, waiting for someone to pick me up

New year, new post

2011-01-05T22:56:00.000-08:00

I recently just bought this 365days notebook from kikki.k and then when I got home, sister told me that her friend is working there and can get discount ahhhhhh tmd!! I am going back there to buy more stuff with the discount and average all the spendings out so I feel better about myself omg I wish I could buy the whole shopppp the stuff there are like damn awesome.

Sucks to have school. I guess some things stay the same. My dread for school.

Want, not need.

2010-11-30T18:57:00.000-08:00

To sit down, think and not do anything else.

2010-11-28T22:45:00.000-08:00

GZ withdrawal syndrome maybe? It feels weird to know that I wont be seeing my teammates everyday till like maybe when the new season starts. My heart is itching to go down to kallang. I cannot afford to become a fat blob! :O

Previous week was unproductive! Totally unproductive!!!! >:(
Only managed to go run on Mon and Tues... Wed totally wasted the whole day away playing omg dont even start about the night and I stayed in bed the whole day on Thurs! Smlj... Forgot what other stuff happened but got to spend alot of time with the mooncake so am really happy hehehehahahahhohoho someone's exams ending yay!

Sighhh me is really getting fatttt and only clocked 10km last week, this week will be a better week, gym run gym run cycle(on the bicycle machine in the gym) and using the crosstrainer shit need to do all thattttt if not I wont be able to eat and oh btwwww am hooked onto this song called Children hahahaha! Oh did I mention that I have fallen ill sigh and that my mucus and phlegm is green + sore throat.

Ohhhhh yday we had swensens Giant Earthquake and I had salmon too omg fat lah fat and only the biased refuse to agree with me.

Team Sg!

2010-11-23T18:20:00.000-08:00

Coming going coming going. Is there really no way to stay or to remain the same?

Backkkkkkkk

2010-11-22T22:42:00.000-08:00

Hi Everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Some choice pictures cause I am lazy to type. Today will be pictures of what we do in the dining area in China hehehe it's where everyone goes to eat(DUH) and oogle at others hahahaha and to exchange badges of course!!!! Food glorious food, you are priority!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay btw, macs was only eaten only AFTER the races okay, not before or during, thanks!

The weekend has come to an end

2010-11-07T03:36:00.000-08:00

and in another 5 days I will be gone D: Some sillygoose worries about me not being able to take care of myself?!!?! What nonsense is this!!! I claim to be so un-worriable(I know there is no such word) but apparently someone else thinks differently. Haizzzzz am I really the silliest creature in every sense of the word?! :O Doesn't matter, rest assured I will come back in one piece and bug the hell out of you! (: I know you'd like that! Hehehehehe

Been awhile since I last posted any picture here and I wish to but there appears to be no relevant picture to post here oh dear words words words and it's making this blog so mundane!

Some overdued pictures to add some spize then hehehe

When Shiya left for Australia to further her studies but then wait no more cause she's coming back on the 29th heheheh we missed you so and cant wait for picnic and outings with our batch and whatsoever (: (:

Went to stayover at Okay's place on her birthday and we spent the first 100mins shrieking over ugly photos in the photobooth and then getting excited over her wooden laptop sticker blahblah hehehehe

During the recent Regatta with the current year2s (:

That should be about the most happening thing in my life now.. Regatta over then Sava coming, which I will most unfortunately miss. Anyway when I finally get my ass back in Sg, I will eat less run more and lose some weight so watch me!!!!!!!!!!!! Grhhhhhhhhhh to all you doubters, I will prove you wrong!!!!!!!!!!!! Gahhhhhh.

Not again.

2010-11-04T00:57:00.000-07:00

Why yes again guess what happened haha I chopped off my hair and then went to colour it. It's now looking damn short D: Sigh I never ever learn my lesson but oh well, at least someone doesnt dislike it (: So my hair is now damn epic hehehe and I love the colour omgggggg

You make me ridiculously happy while I make you smile like a silly goon?!?!?!?!!??!?!

So the weekend flitted away just like that.

2010-11-01T21:02:00.000-07:00

And it's the beginning of a new week. It's the start of a brand new week and there's only 2 weeks left to race and 1 week plus before we fly. I cannot imagine how it would be like to not be able to see you. You are always on my mind, or not far from it. Keeping you close.

Even when I am feeling a little blue

2010-10-26T20:36:00.000-07:00

I wont let anything get to you.

Half the week has gone by in the blink of an eye. Spent my time rather wisely, well at least I think I did. Essay, case study, synopsis.

Woah I forgot to mention that I unloaded 5kg worth of shit yesterday hawhawhaw.

I wished it was simple but we give up easily.

There's so much to do but I just keep procrastinating plus the pimple(I think it's a pimple) at the right cheek is annoying me to no end. I am not used to pimples! D:

I found a way to get in and could you please just let me stay there? I wish I could have the gift of the gab and impress you with my words. But it's enough that you want me for me me. Thank you very much, from the bottom of my heart.

Worth my every smile and tear.

2010-10-26T10:17:00.000-07:00

Been pretty happily hectic lately. All those rushing here and there(not exactly rushing) to everywhere is taking a toil on my pockets D: Can't stop topping up my ezlink card, seriously haha I pay for transport more than my food and that's definitely saying something.

Yesterday saw me spend a productive afternoon doing my thousand word essay which is currently still sitting in my email inbox and my tutor isn't coming today D: sigh I am very much touched by the fact that they actually bother to sms me to ask 'wru' -_- 3 letters can make me feel like they care(am pretty sure they do) about me and want me to do well(i only want to pass and get my dip) and graduate.

Been training, eating, sleeping and taking looooooooooong bus rides. Hahahah no I don't emo during the rides, in case you were wondering, thanks. In fact, I am pretty busy writing notes on other people's notes hahahaha. Somehow cold bus rides are not cold at all.

Wish I could write down how I feel in words just for you but somehow, words cannot express how I feel. You make me exceptionally happy, thank you. No lovey dovey posts here. Am not a sappy romantic, at least not on a space this public...

Pamelasssssssssss

2010-10-20T21:24:00.000-07:00

1. pamela 1206 up, 371 down
usually the craziest of the bunch. quite often has a variety of different laughs, and can perform them all on demand. everybody loves pamela, the type of person you always want to protect. she is a flamboyant driver. loves make up, clothes and accessories
oh pamela's coming. I can't see her but i can hear her.

pam pamalama pammy pam-cakes dingdong

2. Pamela 817 up, 269 down
The pimpest of the pimp. Everyone wants to be a Pamela. Can conquer anything. Wakes up and pisses excellence. Indulges and rules in all gangstativities.< look up >
Your never meet anything above a Pamela, because it doesn't exists.

Man: Pamela you are so amazing.
Pamela: I know, i don't know why, it just keeps happening.
the shit times plus equals bad assness

3. Pamela 318 up, 18 down
Perfection, beauty, style, class, amazing,loving,caring, funny
The woman who helped the ill cat did such a Pamela act

The sunset on the ocean is so Pamela
beautiful perfect funny caring amazing

4. Pamela 439 up, 151 down
Truest of friends, good listener. Witty and charming. Beautiful eyes and soul. Passionate and caring, and can be fiercely stubborn and strong willed. Does not like to be told no. A perfectionist who often causes turmoil for herself. The girl next door, but has an alluring quality about her. Pamela is a complete package that comes with a wide variety of attributes. Pamelas are all a little different, each one is a one of a kind, unique in her own way.

I need to vent right now, I need a Pamela.

That was funny, how Pamela!

If you want a good job, just ask Pamela.

She stayed by her side until the end, a true Pamela.

What a stubborn kid, a real Pamela!
funny pam loyal friend beautiful kind

5. Pamela 218 up, 10 down
The most awesome thing in the planet. A Pamela is always smiling, for whatever reason, her laugh is enchanting. This girl is cool and trustworthy. Lets not forget a Pamela is very sexy. Nothing exceeds past a Pamela. With a Pamela you'll never get bored. Love a Pamela, and you will never Love anyone else. ;)

"Damn, I need a hot girlfriend"
"Get yourself, a Pamela"
sexy hot laughs funny attractive lovable

6. Pamela 211 up, 152 down
Pamela is Greek and means Sweet as Honey. The name "Pam" is rarely used by a TRUE Pamela. Pamela is a Lady in all situations and represents beauty within. Loving, very forgiving to a fault, sweet, kind, christian/godly qualities, southern values, gift giver, flashy romantic dresser, encouraging, brightens a room, friendly, fun, loving the glitz and glamor of life. So nice some people think she is a fake but she is "the real thing".
Pamela is so Sweet, it is ridiculous.
Pamela is such a Southern Belle.
Is she (Pamela) for REAL?
sweet fun glitz kind forgiving

7. Pamela 108 up, 175 down
Pamela means “loved one.” And she is. A TRUE Pamela rarely uses the name “Pam”. Loving heart, the qualities of a goddess, gift giver, encouraging, friendly, fun, loving life in all its forms. But suffers from foot-in-mouth syndrome. She is "the real thing". Loving each step in her life.
Pamela feeds wildlife. Collects friends. Plans for the future.
pam pie pamilia pammy she-who-shall-be-obeyed she

8. Pamela 16 up, 106 down
A girl who is shy but holds her head up high. Is sweet, but also bad when needed. Has lots of friends but only has a couple real BFFs. Is a girly-girl, changes her crush at least every year. From Greek and means sweet as honey or lovable, And is also caring, amazing, and funny. The girl next door perfectionist, the whole package.
"I'm sad"
"Go find a Pamela"
sweet lovable caring amazing funny

9. Pamela 401 up, 580 down
one hot babe =] that talks to phillip on aim
pamela is a babe....
pamela hot cute gorgeous sexy

10. PaMeLa 171 up, 379 down
sometimes shy but yet the LOUDEST when she walks into a room..you know what i mean ;] not perfect but still is confident and so beautiful. ..thats what makes her sO attractive. shes a sly cat with her words, knows what to say, when to say it and how to say it. Never washes her fruit before eating it.

"oh who pamela? oh man, that girl is good with her words.."
pamalamdingdong loud perfect never fruit attractive pamcakes spam pameasy

When the lights go out

2010-10-20T20:57:00.000-07:00

I hear you calling.

Less than a month to flying away. Not prepared to leave and leave everyone behind. I mean, yeah I will still be back but I am just getting used to you what if everything's different after I get back.

(:

2010-10-20T20:51:00.001-07:00

"Wait for the person who pursues you, the one who will make an ordinary moment seem magical, the kind of person who brings out the best in you and makes you want to be a better person. Wait for the person who will be your best friend, the only person who will drop everything to be with you at any time no matter what the circumstances. Wait for the person who makes you smile like no one else and when they smile you know they need you. Wait for the person who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweat and a t-shirt, but appreciates it when you get dressed up for them. Most of all wait for the person who will put you at the center of their universe, because that’s where you belong."

I am glad I make you happy (:

2010-10-19T20:09:00.000-07:00

Twitter style:

Feels happy contented warm fuzzy hopefully this feeling stays
Missed the bolster sighhhh
Wondering what to eat for breakfast and lunch
Tempted to do something exciting
Hangman fun
Abusive relationship pamphlets hahaha
New songs jiggle jiggle bob bob

These are all random updates that nobody ever understands anyway D:

Back to school back to projects back to getting my brain juice sucked dry

The way it goes round and round

2010-10-18T17:21:00.001-07:00

Pamela Ee is early for school today and in fact she's 2.5hours early and is now in class alone with only the computer for company and blogging this chunk of nonsense which nobody in particular will read anyway.

Milk green tea in the morning resulted in a tummyache -.- damn no link but she feels good cause she gets to charge her phone in class so that the battery wont go, wonders why there is no time to charge it at home, cant leave her phone alone for even 5 mins even though the average speed of the msg coming in is 2/hour-.- Oh. Been having insomnia and she doesnt know why. There is not enough sleep for her arghhhh and she has to peel herself off the bed every morning and leave the bolster at home D:

Getting closer to her sister and having htht at night before she sleeps and seriously mei, I need to sleep but your story so interestingggg hehehe and hmmm pam just farted loudly in class thank god there's no one to hear or smell it and information overload but it kinda stinkssss booo to the eggs D:

As the world keeps spinning round, you hold me right here right now.

Needs a new pair of shoes and doesnt understand why running gives her blisters D: Which pair of shoes should she get and there's someone playing the Ponyo song on a piccolo in the morning?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Creepyyyyy okay enough with the rants, pam's gotta go toilet nowww

Needs a space to start ranting

2010-10-17T20:10:00.001-07:00

School has started already and what is this nonsense omg I have to hand up this Marketing Portfolio showcasing some of my better works(out of all those sloppy ones) in my uhm 4 years of life in SPDLA D: Seriously I think the portfolio's gonna look crappy and it'll be damn throw face.

I keep checking my phone for msgs though I know it comes only once in a blue moon. Been happy, very happy. Feel all warm and fuzzy :D

Idk where to go for lunch, decisions decisions... Food!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No place for my head

2010-10-12T22:07:00.000-07:00

Oh well its been quite awhile since the previous update, it should be about 1 week already, no? Holidays havent been treating me good D: And my holidays are ending already oh no back to school in less than a week shuckkkkss I dont want school to start if only there was a way to pause time or rewind it or stop it...

Rowing the not so little boat down the not so streamy stream. Sighhhhh are we merry?

Gahhhhhhh tummy's been all weird recently I dont like it booo the slightest things give me a tummy ache damn it.

Sneaking a post here now that she's gone out to buy food yay love it when people feed me hahaha but she happens to be hungry thats why D:

Oh well life's like that youre happy then youre sad. You get over it and the cycle repeats.

How about a big fat no?

2010-10-03T11:11:00.000-07:00

Running epic failed haha no chance to slim down properly sigh and no chance to conquer my weight D: this is really terrible sigh and my ankle actually cui after awhile of running double sigh lah seriously

Anyway funky mooncake(green tea with tiramisu centre) is freaking cool :D

Short updates:

Nothing much to update about. Been happy and eating alot :D

My missing puzzle piece!!!!

2010-09-30T00:32:00.000-07:00

Hellooooo its almost the end of another week and the once neat sofa is getting messy again hehe oops D: sister is getting pretty havoc these few weeks haha but am very sure she'll survive.

Updating with her BB again hehe I suspect she's been possessed or sth cause she's usually not this nice haha

Lazy to type full long and complete sentences So pls make do with what I have here hehe

Been to <3's house to help her with the pamphlet which turned out to be quite an epic abs trng session but it was completed and my artsy fartst skills are not quite up there sighzzz

3 weeks of holidays just flew past me and nth very productive has happened unless washing clothes and cleaning up the sofa are counted as productive activities.

WatcHing. Smallville sighhhh Kristin Kreuk is so frikkin' hawttttttt omgosh!!

Gonna spend my mornings more productively now that I've worked out a proper schedule.

School's reopening soon and am not prepared for the onslaught of individual project.

The national stadium is finally being torn downnnnn and the road's been blocked and everything and it's been really inconvenient to walkkkkkk anywhere sighhhh so tiring to even walk to the 16 bus stop after trng and now we gotta walk to the outside busstop?!?!?!

Sports massage tonorrowwWw yayness can't wait :D

Gonna get prepapred for training right this momenttttt tata!

its a monday morning and

2010-09-20T08:13:00.000-07:00

I am stuck with sissy poodle in the house and we just conquered the sofa yay and usually its a love hate r/s which I have with her but today seems especially loveydovey hehe and I am happy :D the house smells of dettol right nowww and I am updating this space with the help of her BB(which explains why I think that today's esp lovey) hahaha how nice of her :D love you meimei hehehehe

Watching tv right nowwww hmm there was a lot that I wanted to type but I forgot what I wanted to update about already sigh today is a full rest day and I am gonna slackkkkk and maybe snuggle in bed with a good book :)))))------>getting fatty latty which explains those chinssss

Recent updates about my life, twitter style.

Painted and removed nail polish several times, changing colours almost every three days. So tedious.

Hit the jackpotttttt and had to survive with pads 'cause I was lazy to get tampons.

Have had good meals and nice food recently.

Ajisen cha-shu ramen haha the normal one and without spice okay!!!

Frolick frozen yoghurtttt because it's healthier than ice-cream hehe :D

Hello kitty crocs are tempting me omg so frikkin' cute!! I want omgggg!

A fun-packed kokocrunch with milk right outta the box! Ideal breakfast :D

Throwing stuff at fishes and misleading them to think that it's food is fun x1000 :)))

Been a million years since I chatted on the phone till late hahaha

Last but not least,
Having a positive mindset :D and is determined to make it through hell and anything else!! :D

Some stuff I need to do, constant reminderrrrrr.
-get new contact lense
-change pillow and bolster case
-try to go to the dentist and check out the growing wisdom tooth
-stop drooling when sleepingggggg D:

It's been a longggg update and am lazy right nowwww

It's the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.

2010-09-16T22:06:00.000-07:00

and even forever dont seem like long enough.

Anyway, this week's been good, well, for me at least. One week of holidays has just passed me by and today's a friday already! :O oh the horror. Why does time pass so quickly when I am having holidays! D: this is unfair! 4 weeks left to start of the individual project which I am absolutely clueless about.

In school right now. It's the last day of exams and there are not many people in school D: So boring I tell you. Gahhhhhh.

Wedding's over already and I am wondering how married life is gonna turn out!

Inception

2010-09-08T01:17:00.001-07:00

“You’re waiting for a train. A train that will take you far away. You can’t be sure where it will take you. But it doesn’t matter - because we’ll be together.”

Life's been gewd

2010-09-07T21:42:00.000-07:00

A peaceful bubble and I am in its beauty. Anyway, life can't get any better than right now. The first half of presentations are over and I get to go for lunch hehe food makes me happy and excites me. Ahhhh life can't get any better than this because my presentations are finally over-er-er :D and I have this feeling that we(well, by we, I mean my hardworking group mates who did like 99.9% of the work) aced it omg the lecturers totally loved it. I bet they did. Hahahahaha life is good, I like it.

It's like oh my god?

2010-09-07T09:02:00.000-07:00

A part of me can't believe that holidays are coming so soon. Hahahahaha but it's okay. I am happy hehe good breakfast this morning with soft boiled eggs and bread and wanton noodles with soybean/grass jelly hahaha I thought I was early for lessons but nope I was late!! Damn it but I am in school now so that's all that matters! D:

I can't wait for lessons to be over today so I can go and eat some more hahahahaha 65 kg club, here I come (:

It shall be a short and sweet blog post for now and I forgot to mention that training this morning was a good experience! Nice! Baby I like it, the way you move on the boat. Ohhhh yesterday's training ended early and I got my ass home by 9 plus man hahaha so early for once and I even got to watch some tv with mummy after which I went to sleepppppp but somehow I still couldn't wake up this morning D: was quite tempted to sleep in but heart over mind so I didn't wow draggy post getting so naggy but anywayssss I am lazy now.

Over and out. Bieber fever, seriously? Hahahahahahaha

Immensely relieved

2010-09-06T09:21:00.000-07:00

that school's finally out and yippee the holidays are here and guess what I am gonna do? Train my ass off hahahahaha what an interesting holiday, I absolutely look forward to that whoohoo! :D

Project submission was this morning at 9am and uhmzz I arrived in school slightly after 9 but it's already a great improvement because I usually go to school at 1plus or 2plus on Mondays hahaaha no more Monday blues because school has ended hahaha I went to school for a record breaking time of 2hours D: wasted 1hour travelling to school zzzz but it's okay.

Weekends had been a blast.

Saturday, spent a record breaking 11 hours at Kallang. From 7 onwards it was rowing till about 9 plus then had some talk which was till 10plus 11 then headed to Leisure Park for lunch afterwhich we went back to the bunk to help out for the AustChamp10km Challenge hahahahaha. Congrats to SMU who managed to secure the championship again! Dinnered with teammates and managers at this indian restaurant and woahhhhhh the food was damn shiokkkk and I especially loved the fruit naan thingalinggggg :D :D happy kid is also a fat kid now..

Sunday, twas raining really heavily at Kallang in the morning and I highly suspect that it was raining all over Singapore because it was raining in the East and West. Weather was superb to sleep in but training>sleep. Didn't even get to row and all of us were tortured by the TRX bands and the medicine ball instead D: Haahahaha after training was a trip to town oh town, to look for Hakin's slippers. Ying left shortly after we had lunch and walked Heeren and it was only me and Hakin for the rest of the afternoon/night hahahah lonesome twosome? Off to Far East for a haircut, so yes everybody, I cut my hair again HAHAHAHHAHA I look like a boy right noww D: I never learn my lessons but anyway Hakin dyed her hair and looks more like a minah now hahahahaha walked all the way back to Cine for great food and caught a movie. Heartbreaker. Apparently, it's the No.1 movie in France?! Freaking awesome and we both couldn't stop laughing. Dinnered after the movie and homed. Yawns. Tiring loooooooong day out and I look forward to more team outings/dates/eating/whatever that makes us happy.

Over and out.

Because i am bored and have nth to do

2010-09-02T02:10:00.000-07:00

Therefore i have resorted to posting here again. I feel grouchy sleepy tired and i am a damn slack piece of shit yawnzz its no wonder that i am getting fat omgzz training tonight sighzz no chance to go home early during the weekdays ohdearzz what i life i lead D: tuesdays and thursdays are a killer because gym after rowing can sap 99.9% of my energy and leave that 0.1% for me to ask jiajia nicely as to whether i can hitch a ride and travel home at the speed of lightning -shingshing noise- so anyway my nose is hurting because my specs are pressing on it D: i want to die already zzz hate specs sometimes and this is turning out to be such a ranty and whiny post, so unlike me oh shucksss i am turning into a 'xiao nu ren' isit hahaha then where is my 'da nan ren' to look after me????!!! Gahhhhh nobody wants me lah i shall go die a lonely death ): sobssobs

Anyway this is actually pretty nice to type with hehehe and did i mention that i have gotten a new book to read hehhehehehehe its by Dan Brown and its The Lost Symbol whooohooo i cant wait to start reading it. For now, gotta go for training bye everybodyyyyyyy put your hands up! Put your fucking hands up! Hahahahahaha nobody can handle me D:

We're a broken people living under a loaded gun.

2010-09-01T23:41:00.000-07:00

Like memories in cold decay

I guess it's true what they say. Easy come, easy go. Okay but that doesn't really apply to fats? Why do we get fat so easily and then find it so hard to make it go away?!! Unfair!!!

The month of September is finally here hehe can someone wake me up when September ends? Hahahaha well done, August is finally over :D

Been doing nothing much. School reopened and I haven't been attending it diligently. Really got to thank Mae and Daniel for offering me a spot in their group because without them, I really have no idea what I'd be doing for my project and would most probably get kicked out of school again D:

Gahhh yknow the other day I typed this really long post and somehow I couldnt post it and it never got saved in my drafts so that particular post is gone and I am upset, very.

Far from the world of you and I
Where oceans bleed into the sky

Light and beauty come together in you in a thousand different patterns.

2010-08-20T21:06:00.000-07:00

Time is the enemy of love,
The thief that shortens
All our golden hours.
I have never understood then
Why lovers count their happiness
In days and nights and years,
While our love cab only be measured
In joys and sighs and tears.

If we were one, you and i, together we would make a universe to shake the stars and move the heavens.

The ring of your laughter and the beat of your heart.

2010-08-18T19:15:00.001-07:00

You have a light in you that's almost blinding. But in me there's only darkness. I try to keep that darkness from you because I need your light. I need it desperately but you don't need the darkness.

They float on the surface of darkness in which I'm drowning.

Emotional Intelligence

2010-07-31T08:50:00.000-07:00

It is with the heart than one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.

-The Little Prince

It's like a story of love

2010-07-29T00:32:00.000-07:00

Who in the world will give in to me all the time and let me prod and poke and punch and pinch and bully to no end and at the end of the day isn't even angry with me? I don't even know whether to call it dumb or should I feel flattered. Hahaha I guess I am one hell of a lucky person hehehe

Having blogger and livejournal is really taking a toil on my brain juices! D: Don't feel like updating anything leh. Much to be said but even more to be controlled. Life sucks when you gotta keep everything to yourself but thank God for sissypoodlelulu because she listens to my rants every night when she is not on the phone. HI MEIMEI THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LISTENING TO MY NONSENSE ALL THE TIME HEHE I GOT SO MUCH MORE TO TELL YOUUUUUUUU

And I finished 900ml of low fat milk today whoohoo I am gonna grow taller! And bigger and more muscular. No dieting for me. More exercising hehe please let me be 65kg.

Day 5: My dreams

2010-07-28T21:09:00.000-07:00

Dreams meaning those stuff that I dream of when I am asleep or what I dream to become? :/

Okay fine I shall take it as the former because it is so much easier hehe.

I have plenty of dreams but they always only have one ending. I go to the toilet, pull down my shorts and underwear, sit on the toilet bowl and pee. Wtf?

Day 4: My sibling

2010-07-22T21:02:00.000-07:00

Hi Sister. I know you will read this therefore I have decided to dedicate this post to you hehe and I am waiting for a post for me too hehehe :D

Stop taking my clothes to wear and then start to keep them inside your cupboard because they are mine and as much as I would like to share, I can't fucking share because you wear and you don't fucking wash them. Get more clothes of your own lah wahlaozz get cheaper clothes lah stop buying girlie stuff with lace or flowers or beads because I can't wear them and you are so tall so you buy one size bigger and they look huge and long on me because I am only 1.66cm unlike you 1.73cm piece of long bean. Stop wearing my clothes and stretching them!!!!! I am angry. Promise that if you stop wearing my clothes, I will stop wearing your adidas sports bra and speaking of which, where is my yellow running shorts! Knn.

Love how I can constantly annoy you but you seldom get angry. Thanks for letting my punch and poke you all the time. Heheheheh. Oh yeaaaaaaaaa remember how we used to make up our own songs and take turns to sing to each other when we were younger hehe I love my Pomeranian song hehe I can sing to you again haha and love how you can always listen to me talk non stop. Stop being so fierce to me lah wahlao.

Day 3: My Parents

2010-07-21T19:09:00.000-07:00

Hello mummy and daddy. I know you will never ever ever read this, confirm plus chop never ever because you both aren't even internet savvy unlike your daughter, me heheh.

Anyway, much nonsense going on in the messy house of ours. But I am thankful that I have somewhere to go home to. Even though it's been godknows how long since you both last talked and need me to be the messenger all the time, I am glad you two are still together for the kids, maybe?

To mummy:
Thank you for all the time, money and effort wasted on nagging at me because they always fall on deaf ears. Thank you for giving me all the freedom any child could ever ask for. Thank you for opening the doors for me in the middle of the night during the days when I lost my keys. Thank you for having washed my clothes for idk how many years and thank you for teaching me how to use the washing machine. Thank you for cooking dinner for me and trying to teach me how to cook. Thank you for pretending to not care about me being in DB but always ask whether got win or not. Even though you are biased towards boyboy, it's okay because you still care about me.

To daddy:
Thank you for providing for the house. Thank you for smsing to ask whether I want dinner or not. Thank you for not quarreling with mummy but going into the room to hide. Even though you are obviously biased towards meimei, it's okay cause no matter what, I am sure you love me too.

Thank yous for everything. I don't say it to you but I love you lah.

Eeeeeeeee so mushy.

Day 2: My Crush

2010-07-20T18:33:00.000-07:00

I am sure an 18 year old girl(yes lah, I am 18 niaaaaaaa) has had plenty of crushes and there are too many to name so I am just gonna talk about my first crush?

It happened when I was in Primary One. There was this tall(not-so tall actually), dark and handsome boy in my class and I liked him! Hahaha because I was a tomboy since young and was definitely outgoing and loud and blahblah, well, I basically was everything that I am right now, we could clique and we played together and he was nice to me and blahblah hehehe so I think I fell for him. Ya lah so anyway I liked this boy right but all along I thought he liked this other girl lah. Hahah so I didn't confess D: Besides, I was only in Primary One leh!!!!

The crush lasted for 3 years I think. P1 all the way to P3. Hahaha very 'chi qing' right. I know I know. I guess I was too young and I am not really sure whether it is considered a crush or not. Hahahaha. So he went to the best class in P4 and I went to the second class. Then we were still in different class in P5 and 6. After that then we drifted apart all the way until poly omg. Hehehehehehe fate has it that he came to SP and became my junior in DB-.- of all things. I recognized him immediately hahaha and whoohoo back to being friends now, going home together after training. Talking on the train and bus ride home. Hahaha it is a realllllly loooooooong way back to Tamp from Dover okay.

Anyway, it doesn't matter. I was happy and he was too I guess. Being just playmates and friends. Hi, I know you will never read this but stay strong and jia you :D

Took some 30 day nonsense from Kwansie

2010-07-19T20:53:00.000-07:00

Day 1: My best friend.

Friends are aplenty but what is considered best? I shall just talk about one person and she happens to be the first best friend that I had AND she will most probably never ever read my blog anyway cause we have drifted apart due to busy lives and all that crap but it's okay because I already spent a good 6 years of my life with her. Wow, that's like 1/3 of my life. Hehehe I am only 18 remember! :D

Anyway, she was the tallest girl in my class and we were in the same class for a good 6 years, the whole duration of my primary school life. She was everything I wasn't. She was tall, smart, and pretty. The apple of any teacher's eye. And me, I was the naughty one, the loud one and only God knows how many times have the teachers met my parents. She was the first person I bathed with, took neoprints with. She was class monitress from P1-3 and then prefect in P4, moved on to become Assistant Head Prefect when in P5 and finally became the Head Prefect in P6.

Never knew that we could become such close friends. It's like, we were the opposite of each other. I guess the saying that 'Opposites attract' is true? I still remember that whenever I was naughty, she would threaten to not be my friend anymore and in a way it worked because I treasured my friendship with her too much.

Thank you LSH for everything. Twas a good 6 years of being your classmate and friend. Cheers to 14 years of friendship and still counting! :D

I should start on this after reading Rachel's.

2010-07-19T20:13:00.001-07:00

day 1 — your best friend

day 2 — your crush

day 3 — your parents

day 4 — your sibling (or closest relative)

day 5 — your dreams

day 6 — a stranger

day 7 — your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush

day 8 — your favorite internet friend

day 9 — someone you wish you could meet

day 10 — someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to

day 11 — a deceased person you wish you could talk to

day 12 — the person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain

day 13 — someone you wish could forgive you

day 14 — someone you’ve drifted away from

day 15 — the person you miss the most

day 16 — someone that’s not in your state/country

day 17 — someone from your childhood

day 18 — the person that you wish you could be

day 19 — someone that pesters your mind—good or bad

day 20 — the one that broke your heart the hardest

day 21 — someone you judged by their first impression

day 22 — someone you want to give a second chance to

day 23 — the last person you kissed

day 24 — the person that gave you your favorite memory

day 25 — the person you know that is going through the worst of times

day 26 — the last person you made a pinky promise to

day 27 — the friendliest person you knew for only one day

day 28 — someone that changed your life

day 29 — the person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

day 30 — your reflection in the mirror

Thoughts before turning 18 HAHAHA

2010-07-17T04:46:00.000-07:00

Quite a few people asked me how I am gonna celebrate my birthday but I answered with 'I don't know what's there to celebrate about' hahaha I am becoming older and older and yet remaining as childish as ever D: really makes me wonder when I will ever grow up. So here I am at my grandma's and there is this fat blob of a baby cousin that I really want to play with but because he doesn't see me often therefore he's a little anti social and refuses to let me carry him. I've been holed up in the room ever since after dinner because I am lamenting the fact that a baby, for crying out loud, a baby refuses to play with me, which sets me thinking... Am I that scary? Hahahahaha what will happen when I have a baby of my own hehe will my baby be friendly or will the baby be a scared cat? Hahahaha..

I should really settle down and stop playing so much!!

Oh man. I am getting nearer to death.

Another picture spam?

2010-07-13T02:16:00.000-07:00

Some way overdue pictures just to fill up the wordiness of this blog hehehehe :D

2010-07-13T02:02:00.000-07:00

This old blog

2010-07-13T01:13:00.000-07:00

has been with me for a few years(epic years of my life) now. Seeing me through the many races that I have experienced in this short DB life of mine and it really sucks to say, for the second year in the fucking row, I got a bloody fucking 4th in POLITE!! Fuck my life. Anyway this race was quite bad lah with me being in a bad mood immediately after the race, coughing my guts out, with the throat so fucking dry seeing 3 other boats cross that bloody finishing line before mine did and my temper got the better of me and whooo I threw the almightly paddle which got me through the race into water hehehe what a great show for the spectators(and I have absolutelynofucking idea why I did that, seriously) D: Anyway, it doesn't matter anymore because what is over is already over and I have indeed alongside throwing the paddle, thrown my face and we can only set our sights on the next race, the next cookie to get, the next podium finish to aim for.

We are only as strong as out weakest paddler. And. We can never doubt our team mates.

Digressing abit here:

I hate losing lah. I seriously hate it. (Okay who likes losing right?) Knowing what we could have gotten but didn't. Ah fuck this feeling sucks. We all know how it feels to lose and NOBODY IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WILL LIKE IT. Ah fuck fuck fuck. Fuckity fuck fuck. It doesn't really matter what I sound like right now. To most, I probably sound like some sore loser but anyway, just so you know, your opinions don't matter because I am pissed enough to not care about anything. I am sure SPDB trained hard but the other schools trained even harder. They wanted it more than we did. They were hungry for it and they fought for it. They were fierce and I guess, not all of us were fierce enough. It would be pointless to say right now that if the race were to be 810m, it would have been ours but too bad, it was only 800m and no we didn't get it so guess what... Too bad lor.

Digressing even more:

Looking back at the previous June Race posts and seeing the pictures, I realised how fat my thighs have grown D: D: D: Ahhh the horror!!!!!! Ahhhh someone can just kill me now, please. And my obsession with the weighing scales is coming back (or rather, it was never gone) and it's scaring me to see the numbers slowly(sometimes not so slowly) creep up and it seldom comes down!!! Life is so unfair! I need to get it down by September or I am never ever gonna be pretty enough for that dress/gown. OOOOOOH YES you guessed right, I am getting married-.-

July spells a bad bad month. Firstly, I don't get to win anything and I am getting older. God damn it. Oh dear July, please go away quickly.

'Bronze is an achievement. Gold is an obsession.'

Are we obsessed enough?

More things to say. Now that I am finally leaving the teenage years behind and stepping into the 20+ range, I feel quite unprepared for adulthood. It kinda secretly thrills me that the people at the ticketing office want to check my student pass for an NC-16 movie hahaha but sometimes I feel irked. Indecisive is me. Can't believe that I am really gonna turn 20 and still be so indecisive about my hair. Anyway, problem will be solved soon. HfH is calling out to meeeeeeeeeeeeee hehehe.

Goodday. Hopefully this blog post is long enough. It's the longest blog post since like, godknowswhen hahaha.

Cause now it's over

2010-07-12T00:12:00.001-07:00

and we gotta:

Work it harder make it better do it faster makes us stronger more than ever hour after our work is never over.

Anyway monday blues lah. Woke up early. Went back to sleep. Seriously in nua mode right now. Got to school at only 3 hehe but then there is still nothing to do, only researching for inspirational images :/

Happy occasions in the family :D Can't reveal what though.. Not sure if she will like it or not but it's kinda exciting :D Hehehe and am rather happy for her!

Comp's over. Back to training mode.

Stronger, better, faster.

Cold and rainy week

2010-07-04T20:55:00.000-07:00

Been drizzling like crazy the whole week if I remember correctly and I hope heaven has had its share of the rain and will stop raining pls stop raining okay maybe can rain after SDBF lahhh

Worried! And sleepy. No updates and filled with disgust to say that I didn't manage to clock 30km kns!

We gotta get it back together

2010-06-28T23:33:00.000-07:00

or let it stay smashed forever.

Pig me went to school yesterday(at least I went, although I was late) and then left early cause I needed to head to the airport to send this bosom(hehehehehehe) buddy off. Oh man how time flies right.

We were all in year one then and seeing how everyone from our batch came together to send you off, it made me sad. We are all gonna grow up and leave our dragonboating lives behind. Only the memories will stay. Back then when facebook hasn't appeared in our lives and there was only friendster. Looking back at all the photos in Friendster, don't we all miss times like those. Hahahahahaha when it used to be all of us together with suanling going missing all the time and all those clubhouse moments and lunches/gossip sessions at fc1 -sinks into emo mode now- I wish we had teleporting machines! D:

Land training today and I hope I don't die. Weights conditioning today. Don't really want to condition myself when all I wanna do is to chiong heavy and bulk up.. Need to be strong. For myself. For the team. I am getting all flabby and nuaaaaaaaa D: Run more more more.

Should clock my run this week. Wed sounds great. How about less than this certain timing that I have in mind, that would be great. I aim to clock 30km this week.

2 weeks flew past just like that

2010-06-27T19:43:00.000-07:00

Back to school once more and thankfully, I made it in time for attendance taking hehehe.

2 more weekends to SDBF. Ooooh I am so worried that my toes are shivering with fear hahahahaha awww.

Nothing much to rant about. Gonna be a running freakkkkk!

Stuck in a moment that wasn't meant to last

2010-06-09T18:36:00.000-07:00

I keep thinking and thinking..

Training this morning was more on technique and stuff so it wasn't as tiring as I thought it would be.. I am in school now, after this superbly nice breakfast with The Daughter. Well, daughter's treat of course.

I am overly worried over things I cannot control. Ah! Forget it. I shall go gym to destress now! Byezzzzzzz over and out.

Stuck at the crossroad

2010-06-07T18:28:00.000-07:00

After presentation today, I will be free and can dedicate all my time to training for the upcoming race. To say I am not nervous or worried would be a big fat lie. I am worried. Super duper worried. I am also worried why I am more worried about the races than my own project presentation...

And is it weird to see me in a dress! Whats up with all the reactions that I am getting. You people make it seem as though it happens once in a blue blue moon.. Damn!

Presentation sooooooon. Update again or when I have got things to say. Bye

All Of Your Fears Of Nothing

2010-06-06T19:27:00.000-07:00

Been pretty busy lately. Can't exactly be bothered to update this space of mine anymore. Can I still call it mine? Yawns. School has been pretty normal. Trainings, still be a killer. And sleep time is getting lesser and lesser.

So many events happening within such a short period of time. I need more time! Where is time when I need it. Seriously, someone needs to invent a time-turner (okay hello Harry Potter fanatikkkks :D )so I can have all the time I want. But then someone once said to me, if everybody's wishes came true, the world would be a chaotic place.

My digestive system is awesome. The instant noodles with super alot of chilli flakes at Ronn's this morning while rushing project has been excreted hehehe. I can actually uh (okay this is gross) but I can see the chilli flakes and seeds in the shit hehehehe and my shit floats. I am so healthy. Having floating shit means you are healthy, right?!?!?!

Little things in life make me happy. Like the first text of the morning. The in between texts. Gyming with Shawn and being his paparazzi (snapping pictures of him in the gym and mobile uploading it) is my new thrill. The HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII that Gary gives whenever I walk into class, now, that never fails to crack me up hahahah! Slippers, t shirts and shorts in class make me feel at ease. I doubt I will ever dress up to class. It's been 4 years and I haven't changed my dressing one bit and I don't think it will ever change.

This is the final year in school. After which I will be wandering about, not sure of what to do with my life. I wish to continue studying but where do I get the $$$ from. I feel bad if I ask MM for it but then me is a poor girl with no savings. Maybe I should start saving (oh, that's gotta be the biggest joke ever) from now onwards. Get a real piggy bank (yknow, those in the shape of a pig) and start putting coins in it. Heh heh.

Life's short. Reply fast. Okay bye bye.

Absolutely not having any fun at all.

2010-05-26T01:20:00.000-07:00

One month since school reopened, okay, make that 5 weeks. And the mood for skipping school has set in. Missing lessons. Skipping school. It's recently becoming the norm. I can't catch up with school projects and the only reason I am going to school is because of school training. I have mentioned it time and again, if it weren't for training/dragonboat/girls team, I wouldn't be in school.

School is draining. School is boring. School is absolutely not fun at all. Boring is school. Yawns.

I just want to sleep, eat, run and train all day long.

I want to knowwww

2010-05-21T05:51:00.001-07:00

how to be a lean mean machine.
how to train everyday without feeling tired.
how to do heavier weights.
how to guard my heart.

Miss you guys

2010-05-12T23:43:00.000-07:00

i am having my batch withdrawal symptom ): I know la, take very long to feel this way but the information didn't sink in till I went for school training mahhhh. Feels like ages since I last saw Gwen. Shiya. Bernice. Yunnsin and Suan Lingggggg ): Even though I last saw you guys during campppp but we didn't get to play together. I was busy being a group leader -.-

I don't like to go for trainings knowing that you guys won't be there to train with me anymore :/ Didn't know I would feel this lousy. Yeahhh everyone says we are a team we are a team. I also know that we are a team but I can't help but to feel like an outcast and a lonerrrrr..

Pfffft just wallowing in self pity. Ignore me.

It's time to update

2010-05-10T22:37:00.000-07:00

this stinking space with some complains.

China was a bore and after coming back, fell ill and diarrhoeaed and stuff and lost like freaking alot of weight which is coming back to me as I type this. Caught Ip Man 2 and Ironman 2 omgggg Robert Downey Jr is so handsome la, check out his eyessss.

Training is resuming. I am so tired. Trainings drain people and sleep steals people away ): Tired must sleep what, so who am I to argue with that? Gahhhhh.

Presentation later. Am sleepyyyy. Gnight

New week of school

2010-05-09T21:18:00.001-07:00

and for once, was early for lessons. Submission's at 3 today.

DBFOC10/11 ended yesterday. Am lazy to update. Will do so when there is more to tell.

Another Round

2010-05-07T02:19:00.000-07:00

It's the time of the year again, when the DBFOC is held. Seems like pretty long ago when I was just a freshie hahaha 4th DBFOC in my whole life. What am I supposed to feel. Been very lazy to update my blog..

For the past few weeks that I have been missing, lotsa shit happened. Some good. Some bad. But overall, me is rather pleased with what I have now.

Going for camp. Bye.

Deviated from the original intended purpose of using the computer

2010-02-25T03:11:00.000-08:00

while Bzs busy playing SIMS, I shall update this stinking space. I find it a chore to maintain a blog. I mean, I do feel like having a space to express my thoughts and how I feel about my life and stuff but it's kinda become too open? Hahahaha I dont know buttttt nah I wont be doing the lock up the blog thing. It's boring when no one reads. The whole purpose of writing here, I feel, is to let other people see what you wanna say but without telling them face to face? Some things are better said not in the face.

At least here, I get to type whatever I want without getting blasted directly from other people. If they want to comment, at least I wont be within hearing range. Yes, there are some other people who are as loud as me if not louder. Hard to imagine? Hahahaha am not kidding you.

I keep cooking nice food on cafeworld and it keeps spoiling, and it's wasting all my cafecoins! Okay la I know it's damn lame to cook virtually but at least I cant burn my restaurant down right haha would you rather me burn the house down. Some might say yes cause they feel I am better off dead but then, where's the fun when I am gone hahaha no more topic to bitch about. Eh not trying to be shameless here but hahaha you know I know we all know ^^

Wolfman caught with rachel and bzs. Hahaha though I am into such movies but I must say it wasn't up to expectations at all. Why are the werewolves getting uglier and uglier. I think Underworld has the best looking werewolves and vampires. Blue eyes, where can you find vampires with ice blue eyes? Haha red is boring. To all those twilight fans: Please dont throw any eggs at me hahaha I am a fan of twilight as well, ask me anything and I am pretty sure I can answer but I am not such a die hard fan that I will kill whoever who criticizes twilight. Afterall, it's just a story la please. Try writing one yourself and create your own vampire lover. Hahahaha.

More food time coming this weekend. Keep eating and eating and funnily not worrying whether I will get fat or not. Though am still quite concerned about my weight but I dont care and just continue to eat. Aiyer this broken english is getting on my nerves. Will blog again when I get the feel. Gotta go. Bye.

Did any one of you miss me?

2010-02-23T05:20:00.000-08:00

I guess not ):

Anyway, CNY has come and gone. So has valentine's. Hahaha and Total Defence Day and Time Trial is cominggggggg :O Worried muchhh.

Okay let's see.
5 yushengs in a span of 2weeks or less :/ One family. One bzs. Two team. One spdb. Omggg.
Much fun and laughter with the girls on our bbq friday. Wonder where the pictures are.

Anyway, been running about to the toilet since Sunday evening...... Must have wasted like 232312 litres of water flushing my shit. Hmm heard that if you are healthy, your shit floats? Hahaha as disgusting as it may be, I looked at mine and whoooo it floats. Hehehehehe. But think I ate too much chilli, I can even see the chilli in my shit and it's made my shit turn orange hahaa not normal brown anymore. See, I am special.

Okay byeeeee sleeping time here I come.

2010-02-13T03:58:00.001-08:00

Currently am at the grandma's house and having fun with this cute fat little cousin that I have. What an addition to the family. Hahah finally there are 4 grand children in the family. Used to be only 3 (me, sissy poodle and brother) and the age gap currently stands at 14 or 15 hahahahaha the gap between the brother and the fatty. The gap between me and the baby is about 19. Wah damn fun to play with him though he is damn naughty.

Pictures are up on facebook. Check that fatty out yo!

It's been a long time since I posted

2010-02-10T22:23:00.000-08:00

but this will be one of the last posts of my second year as a second year student. I have submitted my last project (okay that was on Monday) and skipped school (that's on Tuesday) and slacked on Wednesday and presented on Thursday (which happens to be today) and coming back for some briefing and class lunch (the lecturer's treat) on Friday (tomorrow!) hahaha. And then I will be done with year 2, can you believe it?

A part of me is thankful that I retained as I have no idea what to do with my life but another part of me aches knowing that my batch mates will be graduating and that we will be doing different things in our lives from now onwards.

Next Friday would be BBQ or whatever mass dinner with the girls team and I absolutely can't wait for that, I haven't seen them in a million years. All of us have been busy with projects (especially me! I have posted them on Fb for all to see and to act as proof muahahahah!) and studying for exams. Well, I have a paper too and it's on the 18th. I am gonna study hard for it! (: and hopefull do well for it.

Nothing much has been happening in my life. All my mornings are filled with trainings and some evenings are filled with trainings too.

Recently ordered this yummilicious thingy called Accelerade, some kinda supplement thingamajig and it's lemon lime flavoured. Hahah call me weird or what but I loveeeeeeee lemon and lime. Okay actually, anything citrusy la. Hahahaha.

Some things I need to do for the week:
-Run more and not be cuimax@hotmail.com anymore ): Can't believe I punctured after only 28mins of run and it was so bad that I had to sit down a few times on my way back :/ Life sucks. And the surroundings changed colour too. For eg. the grass turned from fresh green to bright yellow and so did the clouds and skies; the dried leaves on the road turned from brownish orange to grey-.- same colour as the road. Ahhhhhhhh the sun must have gotten into my head hahaha hate feeling this weak ah ):
-Eat a donut hehehe I haven't eaten a donut since like forever! This is a lame thing to do.
-Make it under............... I know can already. The whole world don't need to know.

Okay, gotta pack my class table now. I have so many things to bring home. Fml.

Overdue but I still wanna do it

2010-02-03T21:10:00.000-08:00

What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
I don't remember but it wasn't anything too bad. Hahaha passed my freaking ITP, is that counted? Cause I got sacked the first time round hahaha there are plenty of things la like staying over at the gf's so often that I got expelled hahaha then I got back into school again and repeated year2. Became a damn cool girl hahahaha missed SPDB trng camp for the 21312123th time and missed out on Pulau Ubin cycling :/ due to ITP la, thank God I didn't get sacked. Well, actually, almost hahaha.

Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
No, I didn't bother making any in 2008 la. Didn't make any for 2009 either but 2010 saw me make alot of stupid resolutions which will not be kept to anyway. What's the point of making them? Noone ever keeps to them, okay la, maybe a handful do but obviously I do not belong to there hahahaha :/

Did anyone close to you give birth?
No, they all practice safe sex la, I doubt they would dare to give birth anyway, so painful and uhm stretch marks!

Did anyone close to you die?
My hamsters ):

What countries did you visit?
I don't remember but, I don't think I had the time to :/ Well, sentosa is counted right, cause it's over the seas. Need to travel, want to travel. Must. Travel.

What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
More money, better grades, to be promoted to Year3. More time to spend. Do well in whatever I want to do. Better time management. Better stuff to blog about. Loads of material stuff. To be able to lift 15kg bicep curlzz hahaha and bench 25kg per side. Also to achieve 20 pull ups but it seems kinda impossible. But this question is what would I like to have so it doesn't mean anything hahaha..

What date(s) from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Committee meeting which turned out into Winter Wonderland hahaha walking down Orchard wrapped up in winter jackets and scarves and gloves and also ear muffs. Lol. Michelle's party which saw 010 getting drunk (boom mi ah dah boom mi ah...) and seeing her asking stupid questions hahahaha.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Passed my ITP. It's a damn big thing for me cause if I had failed it again, I would have been kicked out of school. Also, picking up computer skills which I never thought I would understand, for eg. Sketch up and autocad. Omg such killers.

What was your biggest failure?
Not being able to win anything with my batch mates, not being able to stand on the podium with them. And I never ever will get to win with them ever again because they are all graduating soon ):

Did you suffer illness or injury?
All the small illnesses definitely but nothing major. Haven't gotten injured in like forever. Oh, went to the hospital to get the cotton bud removed from inside my ear as it had broke while I was cleaning my ear, now, that freaked me out quite badly. Started to cry and all and my mummy told me my lips turned white. Duh! How could I not be anxious right, I had proj submission the next day I think and I was admitted to the emergency ward only at like 12midnight or something and had to wait till about 3 before I got attended to hahahaha

What was the best thing you bought?
Didn't buy much. Bought toy cameras though. Tried to pursue photography but apparently failed hahahahaha or rather didn't carry on with it. Hmm the cameras must be somewhere around the house and the rolls of undeveloped film along with it too..

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
There are alot of names to this list so I won't even bother naming any..

Where did most of your money go?
Cab fares, food, useless things, transport. Mostly on food, junk food.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
All the competitions that I would be going for with my batch mates hahaha it's their last year after all.

What songs will always remind you of 2009?
Love comes again. In the Dark. Sweet things. Mainly Tiesto's Elements of Life album. Hahahaha

Compared to this time last year, are you…
i. Happier or Sadder? Happier because I might get promoted to year three hahahaha
ii. Thinner or Fatter? Definitely fatter. My weight increased, what do you think..
iii. Richer or Poorer? Same la, as poor as ever.

How will you be spending Christmas?
This Christmas? How would I know. Might not live till Christmas haha maybe God wants to celebrate it up there with me, considering if I get up there, that is..

Did you fall in love in 2009?
Let's say, I maintained the love since 2008 la. Hahahahaha

What was your favorite TV program?
Don't remember watching much TV in 2009 :/

Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don't hate anyone. I am too busy handling my own shitzzz.

What was the best book you read?
Read too many books to remember. Loved Blast from the Past, The Reader and also Double Fault. There are so many others, I can't name favourite. Contrary to what I look like, I do read..

What was your favorite film of this year?
Hahaha can I say Twilight lol. There, said it. I just had to. I just had to..

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Fbts and shirt. That will never change.

What kept you sane?
Trainings and my batch mates.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Definitely Lady GaGa.

Who did you miss?
Don't really have the time to miss anyone. Hahaha the only person I would miss would be the person I was staying with hahahahaha

Who was the best new person you met?
Hahahaha how can I rank anyone.

Was 2009 a good year for you?
Yeah, thought it was gonna be bad since I got retained but it wasn't that bad afterall. Am really thankful to all the new classmates and friends that I have made. They really helped me alot in my projects.

What was your favorite moment of the year?
Hahahahahaha Winter Wonderland with my batch mates. Lol.

What was your least favorite moment of the year?
Project submission time..

Where were you when 2009 began?
Working at Rebel as a waitress hahaha trying to juggle with working on friday nights, training on saturday mornings, working on saturday evenings and training on sunday mornings and back to working on sunday evenings...

Where will you be when 2009 ends?
Hahahahaha been with the girl. Lol.

Did you break up with anyone in 2009?
Noooooooooooooooo one year anniversary was in Sept 09 hehehehe

Did you make any new friends in 2009?
Yes, my classmates. Awesome shizzle, they are! (:

Who are your favorite new friends?
No favourites. Too bad. I believe in equality hahahahaha

How many different states did you travel to in 2009?
Like. NONE?!!?!?!?!

How many concerts did you see in 2009?
None. Don't do concerts.

Did you have a favorite concert in 2009?
Refer to the above...

Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2009?
Uhm, I don't remember. Hahahaha.

Did you do a lot of drugs in 2009?
No money to do any drugs la.

Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
Definitely not.

What was the worst lie someone told you in 2009?
Don't wish to remember.

What was your proudest moment of 2009?
Getting back into school and actually learning something..

What was your most embarrassing moment of 2009?
Hahaha I maintain my dignity wherever I go..

If you could go back in time to any moment of 2009 and change something, what would it be?
Go to school when school reopened so maybe I wouldn't have been retained..

What are your plans for 2010?
Hahaha get promoted to year three...

In the darkness you came

2010-02-02T05:09:00.000-08:00

In the darkness you left.

We try to do so many things at once and we make a mess out of everything. We taste disappointments and experience rejection. I have no idea what I am trying to achieve by saying this. Must be myself going crazy after all the hours of being stuck in the classroom. Hahahaha and why the hell am I still blogging when I have got shit loads left to do. Someone, kill me please.

Anyway, am currently re-reading this book, Double Fault. Hahahahaha and I have finally finished re-reading Phantom.

Miss my batch mates so much they have no idea. Gotta give alot of things a miss. I took on more than I can cope with. I need to improve, to buck up, to be more fiercesome. I am never letting you step over me but it seems I have already concided defeat for I have nothing to fight with. I need to have something before I can start talking or fighting back. It's mine, I know it, I gotta work for it.

I don't like to feel unwelcome and nobody understands that. Nobody is like me. Almost everyone I know have a bad impression of me. Life sucks and I don't need anyone. All I need is you but I am not all you need. But I still love my piggerlicious, one and only piggerlicious hahahahahahahaha

Anyway! Say hi to the more the merrier (:

Oh need to learn how to play l4d2.

A Quick One Before Lessons Kill

2010-01-31T17:13:00.000-08:00

I know I haven't been updating much. There has been no time for lengthy pieces complaining about how busy and up to my neck I am due to trainings and projects. The Grandmother was visited by me and piggerlicious on Saturday and we stayed for dinner. Finally, I realised how old she is, she is 75 this year. A full 60 years older than my annoying little brother who is not so little anymore, considering the fact that he is now taller than me and wearing long pants -gasps- Sec 3 already, omg! And I don't think I am home often or early enough because it has been almost a month since secondary schools reopened and I have yet to see my brother in his long pants. You may now call me a loser..

Okay the fake job interview with the teacher ended hahaha and I was unprepared, like duh?! Btw, I keep getting distracted by this book I am re-reading for the 2783461th time. Not joking. I keep reading it that I am sure I can memorize it soon.

'Memories! Memories are like the glow-flies darting across the surface of my mind, showing me here and there images so sharp and vivid that I catch my breath in wonder before the vignette disappears, sinking into the quicksand of vignette and recrimination'

Okay, it's from the Phantom of the Opera and I am wondering whether the story is based on a true story or just created out of imagination. If the Phantom were to be real, he must have been a genius. I mean, geez, he is a scientist, a musician, a doctor, a ventriloquist and god knows what else he can do. Ahh, he can kill.

I need to find new books to read and I have already almost completed all the books in piggerlicious's house. Bleah no money to buy new book. How pathetic.

Gotta learn to be alone. No time no time for anything.

And I don't know why I feel bad when people send me gifts on Fishville and I don't send them any :/ I better start sending them gifts too. Oh and my buzz rating on Cafeworld is dropping!

Almost a week since I last blogged

2010-01-29T03:50:00.000-08:00

Weather has been pretty unpredictable and school as usual has been sucky. BZs has a new name hahahaha Piggalicious (inspired by Fergalicious) isn't it cute haha okay not cute-.-

That pig is off having crabs with her teammates. Oh I am bored.

Project submission on the 8th. Scared. Worried. Still wasting time. Nothing much to talk about. Land training's attendance is kinda sucky. Eeee why everybody busy studying for tests haha there is no one to play with me. I go watch tv now, bye.

What do you say? What do you say?

2010-01-21T19:40:00.000-08:00

Submission is today and I am proud to say that I have completed my drainage plan and plotted it in A1 size but there is nothing to be proud of because I am still buried up to my neck in other parts of this project. Hahahahaha. I'm so unpredictable haha what if I actually do my work this time around? I will not let myself go to waste, I have got my whole life in front of me and I won't it all go down the drain. Grandma isn't feeling all that well anymore. My heart aches. I feel afraid, afraid that I will lose her. No, not now.

Been a busy week. Need some rest time. Ever got the my-heart-skips-a-beat kinda feeling whenever you see the person you like? After all these months, I still can't get over the fact that she is mine. I must have done something right to deserve her. I must have.

''Baby could we make a home in the stars
Baby somewhere in a galaxy far''

But you are far away from me.

Never ever learn

2010-01-19T00:58:00.000-08:00

hahaha Friday is submission and guess who is still here blogging away.

Loads to say but now's not the time. Save me from my misery, would someone end my life for me please. They say people who commit suicide cannot enter heaven but then what about murderers?

I sing because I am free

2010-01-17T03:56:00.001-08:00

“Everything happens for a reason; people change so that you learn to let go, you believe lies so that you eventually trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together.”

Taking the chance

2010-01-17T03:24:00.000-08:00

to blog while BZs isnt around hehe she gets to eat good food and grow fat while I am training hard and still growing fat-.- life sucks like that, unfair much?

2 weeks of school down and I happily didn't do much for my project hahaha I foresee myself getting kicked out of school due to sucky grades which can make one's jaw drop and lousy attendance which is definitely under the acceptable percentage. Oh how am I gonna survive year 3 in the event that I do get promoted? Hahahaha let me think about tht again.

While blogging this, I destroyed four dishes on Cafe World, what a waste of my cafe coins!

CNY is arriving and the fat old cow is going home whooo. Tigger is coming to stay yay! Can't fit into new clothes or rather I haven't tried to yet. No idea what to wear. Can't be my usual boring self anymore. Need to be outstanding hyurkzzz. Well, since I can't grow any much taller, I shall stand out with a quirky sense of dressing but what to wear to fit around my ever growing tummy and flabby arms. The number 1 rule, NO BLACK and it's killing me because black makes me look slim, well, at least a little slimmer than the fat old me nowwwwww.

Old, fat, broke and ugly. Ah, I should seriously kill myself.

What a whiny post, boring.

Lj and blogger have almost the same number of posts already!

2010-01-16T06:20:00.001-08:00

Guess I need to buck up my postings on blogger!

Fat, depressed and a slob. Need I say more?

Oh and I disgust you? Think about maybe all the things that you don't know and we'll see if you are still disgusted when you find out or are you just plain biased against me. I am very much certain that it's the latter.

These days

2010-01-11T01:43:00.001-08:00

Some people can be so selfish and irresponsible. Shirking responsibilities and procrastinating. They don't even act their age. Please grow some brains and try to grow up as well. How old are you already? Stop being so motherfucking childish and you'd do the world a great favour!

And you, you don't even know what I am talking about so don't assume.

One day at a time

2010-01-11T01:21:00.000-08:00

The other day, we were just talking about death at the dining table, no, not while we were having dinner, it was after dinner and we just chanced upon that topic. Who isn't afraid of death? I am, as much as I hate to admit it. I have played out many scenarios in which I would die a horrible death and the most common one would be me jay-walking and then a car comes whizzing past and knocks me to the ground whilst another one will run me over and flatten me like a roti prata. Scary thought? But as possible as can be if we are not careful. Another of my scenarios would be me, while walking down the stairs, I'd trip and fall and break my neck. Hopefully there would be instant death because the thought of being paralysed scares me to death hur hur hur joke.

Am nearing 1/4 of my lifespan already. As much as I want to look good when I die, I absolutely refuse to die so early and if what they say about 2012 is true, we are all going to die in approximately another 2 years. How can that be possible? Does anyone have any idea what else have I to do before I feel that I can leave this world peacefully? I have not gotten married, learnt how to drive or ride a motorcycle, gotten a degree, or even graduated. I think I might just be the most under-qualified ghost in history, with no achievements to speak of :/ That would suck. Boooo ): A thought that has been constantly nagging me, where would I go after death? Thinking about it just makes me want to go to sleep. It's a topic I think about almost every night since I learnt how to think before I go to bed.

On a side note. Hahaha my sleeping habits are screwed up. Sleeping at about 12mn and waking up at about 4am. That's about all the sleep I can manage to steal. Screwed right. Not to mention I have got the final project looming over me. Even if I were to go to bed early, something in me makes me toss and turn and cause me to be unable to fall asleep. I want to but I can't. Why is that so?

I believe I have become more patient hehehe as in the way I talk to people, I do not scold or kp them as much anymore and I am proud of myself because I speak to them in a civilised way. We must all keep our heads up and improve. Let's all work together for we are, only as strong as our weakest link. We do what's best for ourselves and ignore all the others. We have each other (:

Phew, wordy much.

Stuck in gems class

2010-01-07T21:55:00.000-08:00

And am watching some food etiquette video which is boring the life out of me. Trying to update with the itouch but it is turning out kinda disastrous haha there are so many typos :/ abs aching like mad! Can't laugh properly for nuts ): hahaha I cannot even stretch properly! Oh dear. Anyway, have been early for lessons this week till Friday haha was late for about 3 hours, couldn't be bothered to wake up ): teacher is yakking away and another hour to end of gems but someone just walked in! How incredible! I guess it doesn't matter since she hasn't taken the attendance haha should have came late too. Ah, am so bored.

Ooooh SP open house! I went to visit yunn sin with bernice before heading down to kallang.
Need. To. Train. Harder.

You are what I never knew I always wanted

2010-01-06T21:05:00.000-08:00

I love you. 3 words, 8 letters. You mean the world to me.

2010-01-06T20:57:00.001-08:00

Cant help it

2010-01-06T20:19:00.000-08:00

Ever chanced upon like a blog or whatever and then you start reading it and get so absorbed in other people's life and continue to read their archives till like you reach waaaaaaaaaaay back into their past when you didn't even know each other yet? Well, isn't it worst when the blog you read happens to be that of someone you love or like or have a crush on or maybe even your eye candy's blog.

So you read and read, and find out that they were so in love and blah blah. She is afraid to lose her lover and you find yourself stinging with jealousy. If it were someone you love, you start to compare yourself to The Ex. And you tell yourself you can treat her better than that, make her happier.

Everyone does that. We all know we shouldn't but we can't help it. Human trait I guess.

Stole this from somewhere.

2010-01-04T22:39:00.001-08:00

Where do I get moolah?

Fat as a pig

2010-01-04T22:23:00.000-08:00

On a cheery Thursday last week.

3 of us little pigs came out to play and stuffed ourselves so full of salmon sushi that we almost burst. Well, actually I was the one eating all the sushi hahahaha Kwansie eats burnt sausages and BZs just likes her su soba. Mmm sushi buffet makes us all fat. Ksws got her Jelly Lenses and am planning to get the pink one too so fun so fun but the effects abit messy. Just a little bit.

Love how we 3 can always meet up and just eat like pigs hahaha much love!

The guy I am drooling over, JY!

2010-01-04T22:00:00.000-08:00

Got this off somewhere.

2010-01-04T20:46:00.000-08:00

I confess that in 2009 I…
( ) stayed single for the whole year
( ) made out in/on a car
( ) kissed in the snow
( ) celebrated Halloween
(x) kissed in the rain
( ) had your heart broken
( ) broke someone else’s heart
(x) had a stalker (hahaha stalkers can anot?)
( ) went over the minutes on your cell phone (don't talk on the hp)
(x) had a good relationship with someone
(x) someone questioned your sexual orientation (Ha ha obvious alr and they still ask)
( ) gotten pregnant
( ) had an abortion
(x) have a relationship with someone you’ll never forget (Hi BZs hehe)
(x) done something you’ve regretted
( ) lost faith in love
( ) kissed under a mistletoe

SCHOOL
( ) took an honors/advanced class
(x) broke the dress code (all the time :/)
( ) sent to the principles office for misbehavior
( ) straight A’s
(x) met one teacher you really like
( ) met one teacher you really hated
(x) failed a class (retained one whole year :X)
(x) skipped school
(x) did something you were proud of
( ) discovered a new talent
(x) proved yourself an idiot
(x) embarrassed yourself in front of the class
( ) fell in love with a teacher
( ) intentionally tripped someone at school
(x) were involved in something you’ll never forget

OTHER
( ) painted a picture
(x) wrote a poem (read through my archives, confirm have a poem)
( ) shopped at Hollister or Abercrombie and Fitch
(x) posted a blog
(x) listened to music you couldn’t stand
(x) went to a sleepover
( ) went camping
( ) threw a surprise party
(x) laughed till you cried (as always)
(x) laughed till you peed in your pants (happens but I don't tell people hahaha)
( ) visited a foreign country
(x) cut in a line of waiting people
(x) told someone you were busy when you weren’t
( ) partied to celebrate the new year
(x) cooked a disastrous meal (cook eggs also spoil)
( ) lost something/someone important to you

In 2009 I…
(x) broke a promise
(x) lied
(x) went behind your parents back
( ) cried over a broken heart
(x) disappointed someone close
(x) hid a secret
( ) pretended to be happy
(x) slept under the stars (and under the ceiling and under the fan)
( ) kept your new years resolution
(x) forgot your new years resolution
( ) met someone who changed your life
(x) met one of your idols (hahah so many!)
(x) changed your outlook on life
(x) sat home all day doing nothing
(x) pretended to be sick
( ) left the country
( ) almost died
( ) given up something important to you
( ) lost something expensive
(x) learned something new about yourself
(x) tried something you normally wouldn’t try and liked
( ) made a change in your life
(x) found out who your true friends were
(x) met great people
(x) stayed up til sunrise
(x) cried over the silliest thing (over not being able to eat banana prata)
(x) was never home on weekends
( ) got into a car accident
(x) had friends who were drifting away from you
( ) had someone close to you die
(x) had a high cell phone bill (keep topping up my prepaid)
(x) spent most of your money on food
(x) had a fist fight
( ) went to the beach with your best friend
(x) saw a celebrity
(x) gotten sick
(x) became closer with a lot of people

Saw this somewhere and just had to do it hehehehe

Afternoons are best spent napping

2010-01-03T21:57:00.000-08:00

not being in class, freezing and doing nothing productive.

I am such a lazy bum. I keep wanting to sleep all the time and usually end up doing some other things instead, like for eg. now, I am blogging about all the unnecessary details of my mundane life. What's there to blog about? School just started. Hahahaha and no prizes for guessing what I did. Telephone role play test this morning went alright, I guess/think/hope/feel.

Someone very important is hooked onto RA2, maybe I should start finding other things to do?
-blog more about my nothing-ness. Why can't I seem to blog nicely with intellectual quotes or phrases or some sort like that? Ah, it might be because I haven't been reading.
-watch tv and be entertained by Discovery Channel (Eh, I really like that channel okay!) or Animal Planet or HBO or random shows that I chance upon, but I say stick with Discovery Channel la.
-youtube and watch Hi My Sweetheart haha heard it's really good but I have not checked it out
-read more mmm this might work because I just borrowed a book from Bzs, if I have to wait for her to finish the book before I can read it, I doubt I will ever get to read it hahaha I am a speed reader but I read every single word so I should be the one reading first, no?

Running out of ideas.

Love reading blogs that sound intellectual and unfortunately, mine isn't one that I'd choose to read. Always been wondering how people can have their command of the English Language so high up in the sky. I wish to be like them but I don't know how to phrase everything so nicely that it all melts together. No brain juices available at the moment.

Haven't been thinking much about my future but because I am fickle minded, currently, I am planning to go into teaching after poly. Like, NIE or something. I don't know. Right now, I wanna be a PE teacher in primary school but I heard that I must teach some other thing other than PE? Maths, I choose you hehehehe. And yes, you saw correctly, I wanna be a teacher and no, I don't think I will scare the kids because by the time I become a teacher, I would have (hopefully) mellowed down and won't be so loud anymore but count on me to be fierce, don't play play with me. Air stewardess still sounds not bad to me..

Cannot resolve to stay happy la, gonna break that resolution. I am a sulky girl now. I want to sleep but I can't find a comfortable position and the bolster smells weird and that's not helping and I haven't watched Avatar and I hope I get to watch it on Wednesday and I need a job and I think I broke 2 resolutions already (the not to be so self obsessed one) oh and read Rozz's blog hahaha so funny. I finished reading it already and also Xx's hahaha shall read Tammy's nowwww since I can't get to sleep.

Oh, what a boring life.

And I finished Hot Shot in like what? 2 days? Hahahaahahahahahahha

Oh, tell me what's new again?

2010-01-03T03:18:00.000-08:00

Anyway, I wonder how come we can and you can't? Full of excuses, as usual.

Word of the day: Expectations
The higher it is, the greater the disappointment.

You're not easy to find

2010-01-01T09:01:00.000-08:00

Anyway, was being my usual annoying self towards my sister at home at 00:48:23 in the morning of the 2nd day of the damn big deal new year. Like hey! It's 20-freaking-10! Howdie mate! As usual as well, I have deviated from my main point. My point is, after bugging my sister and annoying the crap outta her, I finally got her blog address heh heh my skills put to good use. Depending on whether Beezees is nice to me, I will then decide again whether to tell the end results of my hardwork and share my information with her. Think I most probably will since I am so -ahem ahem- nice (:

So anyway, me sissy poo told me she has a friend who writes damn well and I was like who the hell is that and she was like blah blah blah and I was like blah blah blah and yah dah yah dah all the way. So I decided, being the stalker that I am, to go check it out yo! Sorry la, abit buay tahan what. Kpo and plus must see who so pro.

The blog didn't appear like those typical what-I-do-when-I-wake-up kinda blog. It was quite well written considering the fact that the author is a self confessed trouble maker. It really made me think that maybe we are usually too fast to judge.

Are people with tattoos bad? Tattooing is a form of art and if the person chooses to put that piece of art on his/her body, then it's their choice. I am pretty sure your parents have told you at one point or another in your life that tattooing is only for bad people, for gangsters and that you will never be hired if you have a tattoo. What a load of shit. I mean, it is true to a certain extent that members of certain gangs get inked for identification and such but does that mean everybody or anybody who is inked is a baddie? I don't think Beezees is a baddie. Somebody has a pet scorpion by the way. Hahahahaha.

Which brings me to another point, are the people in EM3 or Normal Tech or even ITE very stupid? I feel like everybody has this unspoken agreement that people who are in such streams are useless bums who are wasting their parents' money because they don't study. There are some who really cannot study, some choose to not study, some didn't choose to not do well. There are also some who have gone to do well in life even though they came from such streams. Articles are aplenty in the newspaper telling us about how so and so became a business man even though he came from ITE blah blah.

Are we stereotyping people and classifying them too easily? Needless to say, I belonged to a group like that too. I am not afraid to say I am quite smart but extremely lazy. I dislike studying and I absolutely hate mathematics. Coming from a good class, of course I thought that people who were in lousier classes were of a lower standard that I was. I wasn't the top 10 in class but that didn't stop me from thinking that I was superior to those in other classes. Did relatively well and went to a relatively good school. But so what? From there came my downward spiral due to my laziness and irresponsibility. My time management sucked and I didn't do well in my studies at all. Ha ha ha. So anyway, I ended up in a poly while those other 'inferior' students who went to other neighbourhood schools ended up in JCs. While I was stuck for another year in my course, they went on to studying in universities. No prizes for guessing who has the last laugh now.

2010, a new year. A new start. Even though every year is a new year. It's time we stop letting it pass us by and start to do some good and pass on some good karma, well in simpler terms, change for the better. Stop judging people, they very often turn out to be better than what you thought they were. Give them a second chance. My mother gave me a second chance when she agreed to let me continue in my studies even though I failed her. Start being thankful for small things in life. Thanks Sissy Poo for letting me have your blog address, actually I think you spoil me sometimes hehehe!

Okay, I think you have just about had enough with the new year thing. Mwah! A kiss for you since you finished reading this post. And that goes out to you, sissy hehehehe you are my personal stalker heh heh heh. Oi, this post good enough anot.

Edit: Wah fuck (oops!), I think I am crazy because everytime I post an entry, I will publish it and then read through and go back and start editing the post due to spelling mistakes or grammatical errors or whatsoever. I am such a freak :S But how come my english seems to still suck and sound weird and make me appear so un-atas? ): Life sucks.

First Post of the Year

2010-01-01T05:10:00.000-08:00

and am wondering whether I should talk about what's went on for the past 21hours of 2010. Nah, don't think I will as that is a tad boring. Been chasing Hot Shot on YouTube and has been quite successful because I managed to watch 14 episodes already hehehe I am sucha pro right?

Currently leeching my cousin's wireless connection with the help of beezee's laptop. Finished my steamboat dinner which I didn't eat much of as a big part of my stomach as well as my heart went to Hot Shot haha why do I make myself sound like an idiot. It's not as if those actors will notice me ): Anyway, my cousin is talking to me in like such a deep voice and I cannot catch it, too low a pitch for me :/ and looking up at his ceiling, there appears to be a galaxy and therefore I give you a picture of it. It's not that the lights are off, I myself have no idea why the picture turned out like that hahahaha lousy photobooth and he is currently designing his own game, like whutttt?!?!?!?!?! o.O omg overly creative and such a genius, I kid you not.

Back to Hot Shot.

The year

2009-12-31T05:35:00.001-08:00

will inevitably come to an end on 11:59:59pm today and 2010 will begin.

Certain decisions made this year has caused me to repeat a year in poly and therefore am unable to graduate with my batch mates but I am indeed lucky to have a coach that allows me to row and continue in the team despite my bad academics. 2010 will be a year that I will leave my teenage years behind, all those stupid mistakes and wrong decisions will also be left but the consequences of some of my actions will never be erased and will instead follow me wherever I go. All I hope and want is to learn from my mistakes (which experience tells me, I never ever learn!) and be a better person.

Some achievable resolutions for the new year include:

1. Staying happy and this is the number one and most important because if I can't even make myself happy, the chances of making someone else happy is even lesser.
2. Loving myself more, this includes not punching the wall when I am mad which causes me to have swollen knuckles and fat hands :/ and if I can't even love myself, how do I spread the love to others?
3. Being a better daughter and I can start by shouting at my MMDearest lesser. I am such a vulgar person that sometimes I don't even think twice before I hurl vulgarities and I know that hurts my MM's feelings, I feel bad and I know I can do something about it so I will, in the new year!
4. Less vulgarities but it seems a little unachievable therefore I shall limit myself to maybe 10 a day hahaha when I can currently do like maybe 100 in half a day now!
5. Be less self-occupied. Instead of thinking so much about my physical aspects, maybe I could start thinking more about my projects!

Forgetting about making anymore resolutions, half of them don't come true anyway. Other simpler resolutions include those superficial ones like losing weight and finally maybe hitting my dream weight which apparently isn't very ideal to others, achieving my muscle definition which I can't achieve without losing the fats first so don't blame me for wanting to lose weight hahahahaha and also maybe try to grow long hair or at least start to make up my mind about which hairstyle I want, not forgetting that I also want to try and save some money for a nice vacation somewhere over the rainbow. Oh and also, wishing that I will become more intellectual or maybe at least sound more intellectual when I blog. But tell me, how can I sound intellectual when the most recent book I read was a Lizzy McGuire series? Did I even get the spelling right? Ooooh, I also maybe want to try to start typing in proper english but I am afraid that will be unattainable because, as much as I am ashamed to say it, I will, laziness gets the better of me all the time :/

New year, new commitments.
I guess I really need to buck up if I don't want to be a failure. Need to manage my time well to juggle between killer CCAs and stressful studies. Sometimes I just want to quit school and go out to work but where can I go with only an 'O' level cert? I certainly do not have the capabilities of opening a blogshop (and besides I think the clothes I sell will be quite quirky and noone will ever want to buy it and the blogshop will just go bust!) and managing all the money, clothes blah blah how tedious is that when thinking about it makes my want to scratch my hair off my scalp!

Peering into the bag and trying to see what 2010 will bring and at the same time wishing I were King of the world and Queen of her heart.

A girl coming 20 still hopelessly in love with another girl and I know this will work out if I put my heart and soul into it. Wait, I already have and still am.

Been so long since I updated

2009-12-29T20:25:00.000-08:00

Havent been up to anything productive lately. The last time I updated seems so long ago and I am very tempted to write like many paragraphs of what I have been up to but I feel like there is no point.

My mind is already almost completely made up. I am gonna join Adidas Sundown Full Marathon, as for the Ultra, I might join that when I have gone completely crazy.

New shoes as Xmas present from The Girl <3 and I made her give it to me in advance but ever since then it's been sitting inside its shoebox. I have not brought it out for a stroll. Kinda feels like I can't bear to bring it out for fear of spoiling it or making it smelly. Love the shoe too much! Best part of all, it's bright orange. The whole freaking shoe except for the soles of course (ingenious because I simply wouldn't step on it if it were orange!) is bright orange! I am so so so extremely excited about this shoe and I cannot wait to bring it out but I have got to get over the 'I-can't-bear-to-spoil-it-in-any-way' mindset first. Take a look!

Comm meeting/Xmas winterwonderland with the ladies and guys-.-

Love all of you, yes, Suanling the idiot is included even though we caught her at Ion with her 'father'! What an ass.

Michelle's 21st birthday bash was almost a big success heheh considering the fact that Yiling the shorty got herself drunk with help from me and Yunn Sin (who was also freaking red faced btw!) and she(Yiling I mean) even proclaimed me as the Love of her Life. Doesn't it show how gone she was hahahahahahaha and a long way from coming back to Earth. Hohohohoho.

Awesome partnership with Shiya hehehehe take a look!

Tadahhhh! Anyway, Weng Shiya, Me love You much even though you are gonna graduate soon and you keep untagging your unglam photos on FB! No! We are in this together and we glam and unglam together okay! Stop being so evil! And also, we are gonna keep trying our jump shots(since it keeps failing!) and keep taking our favourite(and gonna be famous soon!) pose together hehehehe.

Bernice the Bitch! (:

Hurry start packing your room so you can go for training tmr. We need to work harder and train harder! (: Love you so much you also don't know lor.

Anyway, missed out on mentioning the tanning session with Gwen hahahahaha we went on a Monday after work, early in the morning where I had my dosage of Hotness, well there was this girl who was so damn hot in a yellow bikini, and she had a hot ass and well, 8 pack if you can believe it and also a pair of neverending legs hehehehe and got ourselves burnt so badly, well, I burnt quite badly and had blisters on my tummy ): And Gwen's skin was so slow reaction hahaha her burn appeared like a few days later :/

Actually, I have plenty more to say but I have decided to keep it for next time so I wont run out of things to blog about, if I have the time to blog that it. Trying to save money for a vacation. Should start making my new year resolutions(though I am pretty sure I wont keep to it.) as well. And uhm, get a new hair cut when I finally make up my mind, I can't seem to decide whether I want it short or grow it out long. As usual, it looks like a clump of nonsense and it's ruining my already ruined image. But good news would be, I can finally tie my hair. Gosh, I think this is already the longest hair length that I have had in like 2 years hahahaha.

Oh it seems I did write quite alot huh hahahahahah couldnt resist it, oops too bad!

Trngs and trngs and some time to play.

2009-12-17T07:39:00.000-08:00

Trainings has been alright? Have I blogged about training already? My life is getting boring. I am not as intellectual as I want to sound. I sound so preoccupied with myself. Am just like a spoilt brat.

Tuesday was alright, just that the warm up run almost killed all of us. Sun was being all heartless and bitchy. Think it hates us or something and wanted to burn us all to death. Bench press was excitingggggg ^^ Uh medicine ball was a killer as usual. Beezees came back on Tues. Went tanning with Michelle and Sam at HP2, bnj's rather fattening as I gained nearly 2kg after eating it :/ Shall swear off ice cream for a week or sth ): ): ): I wanna try the dark chocolate orange from Haagen Daaz though... Gymed a second time in NP with SnM and nearly died. Muscles are aching like mad from morning's training.

Wednesday, slacked a whole day at home while beezees went to school. Slept when she got back from school. Dinnered and then movie-ed. Caught Storm Warriors, shi shuai de lor.

Sea rowing on Thurs. Hahahaha was alright luhhhhhh. Technique technique!! Keep reminding yourself! I know I am naggy but it's for your own good! Sushi buffet with beezees, sam and michelle. Hahahahaha and M dabaoed the food for her Yuenboiboi, omgggg first time I see such thingssss and I was actually the accomplice. Went to play l4d after the buffet and the feeling of puking came. Met bel and then sam and walked around. Apparently, there are sales everywhere but no mommy, no money. Maybe got beezees then got money? I wish...

l4d-ing now actually but I feel like puking, therefore this update. Night.

Guess what came to stay?

2009-12-16T04:03:00.000-08:00

So cute right? Anyway, beezees is back with Domokun. What shall I name it? Mmm, brownie? Okay and that shit is the real thanggggg so it cost like 30bucksssss or sth. Beezees got her whole transformers set-.- Expppppppppp lika mad, we could have gone for a good meal hahahahha. Sushi buffet on Thursday! Yippee.

Hate it

2009-12-13T16:02:00.000-08:00

when you people try to sugar coat your words. I don't need it, heck, we don't need it. I don't fucking need your pity. I am better off alone anyway. Screw you la. If you are out to do that, I can ruin your life too. Okay it's just me thinking too much.

First trng was such a bitch. The sun was a merciless killer and I got easily agitated. Sitting behind made me realise that most people don't even go full blade? Like okay chill, I can't blame you all cause you are supposedly new and fresh (: (: (: BUT isn't it high time to start reminding yourselves? :/ Whatever, to hell with you if you think I am too harsh. If you think I am harsh, remind yourself that losing is even harsher.

Back to myself, I feel lonely at trainings but not now, not so soon but soon enough I think. I know I will feel lonely in time to come.

Life sucks. Someone get me outta here!

Beezees, hurry back pleaseeeee. I got loads to unload ): ): ):

Shagged spells pam, shiya and gwen

2009-12-13T15:54:00.001-08:00

Hahaha three of us act yi ge smart want to go work overnight all as some book binder and here i am stuck in shiya's house before we head out to sentosa. hopefully we get some good weather. please please let me have some good weather. i need to tann my tummy and pray that the heat will burn my fats and i need to tann my thunderthighs tooooo. one of the disadvantages of being a db paddler is that one thigh tends to be darker than the other thigh.

oooooh shiyas daddy is quite handsome and her mother is pretty lor. hahahahahaha. me mummy is so fat and cute (:

sissy decided to be nice

2009-12-12T06:24:00.000-08:00

so she lent me her laptop after suffering 10mins of unbearable bugging by me hehe. sometimes i feel that she is older than me and anyway guess what? my dearest little brother is freaking taller than me already. omg i am such a loser. guess who is gonna be the shorty this new year. life sucks, i am depressed already. so people, if you think i am tall, take a look at my siblings, then my cousin. hahahaha i am so short and fat when compared to them but but but i got the muscles that they dont have hehehehe ^^

did some community work this morning. i better get some good karma please. i need all the karma i can get to grow taller. i need to grow taller or i would become the laughing stock.

holidays are here. in need of some tanning. mm starting to peel from the marathon. think i took too long to complete, thats why i got burnt. omg, such a loser-.-

Need to start

2009-12-10T17:58:00.000-08:00

learning how to make cupcakes first then I can start decorating it hehehehe who would wanna try my baking? Swear to God it's edible. But then, if I made such pretty stuff, how could anyone bear to eat it!

Lunchbox anyone?